雙語(yǔ)名著·追風(fēng)箏的人 The Kite Runner(68)

12歲的阿富汗富家少爺阿米爾與仆人哈桑情同手足。然而，在一場(chǎng)風(fēng)箏比賽后，發(fā)生了一件悲慘不堪的事，阿米爾為自己的懦弱感到自責(zé)和痛苦，逼走了哈桑，不久，自己也跟隨父親逃往美國(guó)。

成年后的阿米爾始終無(wú)法原諒自己當(dāng)年對(duì)哈桑的背叛。為了贖罪，阿米爾再度踏上暌違二十多年的故鄉(xiāng)，希望能為不幸的好友盡最后一點(diǎn)心力，卻發(fā)現(xiàn)一個(gè)驚天謊言，兒時(shí)的噩夢(mèng)再度重演，阿米爾該如何抉擇?

故事如此殘忍而又美麗，作者以溫暖細(xì)膩的筆法勾勒人性的本質(zhì)與救贖，讀來(lái)令人蕩氣回腸。

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THEY’D BOTH BEEN CRYING; I could tell from their red, puffed up eyes. They stood before Baba, hand in hand, and I wondered how and when I’d become capable of causing this kind of pain.
Baba came right out and asked. “Did you steal that money? Did you steal Amir’s watch, Hassan?”
Hassan’s reply was a single word, delivered in a thin, raspy voice: “Yes.”
I flinched, like I’d been slapped. My heart sank and I almost blurted out the truth. Then I understood: This was Hassan’s final sacrifice for me. If he’d said no, Baba would have believed him because we all knew Hassan never lied. And if Baba believed him, then I’d be the accused; I would have to explain and I would be revealed for what I really was. Baba would never, ever forgive me. And that led to another understanding: Hassan knew He knew I’d seen everything in that alley, that I’d stood there and done nothing. He knew I had betrayed him and yet he was rescuing me once again, maybe for the last time. I loved him in that moment, loved him more than I’d ever loved anyone, and I wanted to tell them all that I was the snake in the grass, the monster in the lake. I wasn’t worthy of this sacrifice; I was a liar, a cheat, and a thief. And I would have told, except that a part of me was glad. Glad that this would all be over with soon. Baba would dismiss them, there would be some pain, but life would moveon. I wanted that, to move on, to forget, to start with a clean slate. I wanted to be able to breathe again.
Except Baba stunned me by saying, “I forgive you.”
Forgive? But theft was the one unforgivable sin, the common denominator of all sins. When you kill a man, you steal a life. You steal his wife’s right to a husband, rob his children of a father. When you tell a lie, you steal someone’s right to the truth. When you cheat, you steal the right to fairness. There is no act more wretched than stealing. Hadn’t Baba sat me on his lap and said those words to me? Then how could he just forgive Hassan? And if Baba could forgive that, then why couldn’t he forgive me for not being the son he’d always wanted? Why--“We are leaving, Agha sahib,” Ali said. “What?” Baba said, the color draining from his face.
“We can’t live here anymore,” Ali said.

他們雙眼紅腫，我敢肯定他們一定哭過(guò)。他們手拉手站在爸爸面前，而我則尋思自己究竟在什么時(shí)候具有造成這種痛苦的能力。
爸爸開(kāi)門見(jiàn)山，問(wèn)道:“錢是你偷的嗎?你偷了阿米爾的手表嗎，哈桑?”
哈桑的回答簡(jiǎn)單得只有一個(gè)字，以他嘶啞孱弱的聲音說(shuō):“是?！?br />我身體緊縮，好似被人扇了個(gè)耳光。我的心一沉，真話差點(diǎn)脫口而出。我隨即明白：這是哈桑最后一次為我犧牲。如果他說(shuō)“不是”，爸爸肯定相信，因?yàn)槲覀兌贾拦膩?lái)不騙人。若爸爸相信他，那么矛頭就轉(zhuǎn)向我了，我不得不辯解，我的真面目終究會(huì)被看穿，爸爸將永遠(yuǎn)永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)原諒我。這讓我明白了另外的事情：哈桑知道。他知道我看到了小巷里面的一切，知道我站在那兒，袖手旁觀。他明知我背叛了他，然而還是再次救了我，也許是最后一次。那一刻我愛(ài)上了他，愛(ài)他勝過(guò)愛(ài)任何人，我只想告訴他們，我就是草叢里面的毒蛇，湖底的鬼怪。我不配他作出的犧牲，我是撒謊蛋，我是騙子，我是小偷。我?guī)缀蹙鸵f(shuō)出來(lái)，若非心里隱隱有高興的念頭。高興是因?yàn)檫@一切很快就要終結(jié)了，爸爸會(huì)趕走他們，也許會(huì)有些痛苦，但生活會(huì)繼續(xù)。那是我所想要的，要繼續(xù)生活，要遺忘，要將過(guò)去一筆勾銷，從頭來(lái)過(guò)。我想要能重新呼吸。
然而爸爸說(shuō)出了讓我震驚的話:“我原諒你?！?br />原諒?可是盜竊是不能被原諒的罪行啊，是所有罪行的原型啊。當(dāng)你殺害一個(gè)人，你偷走一條性命，你偷走他妻子身為人婦的權(quán)利，奪走他子女的父親。當(dāng)你說(shuō)謊，你偷走別人知道真相的權(quán)利。當(dāng)你詐騙，你偷走公平的權(quán)利。沒(méi)有比盜竊更十惡不赦的事情了。難道爸爸沒(méi)有將我抱在膝蓋上，對(duì)我說(shuō)出這番話嗎?那么他對(duì)哈桑怎么可以只是原諒了事?而且，如果爸爸肯原諒這樣的事情，那么他為何不肯原諒我，僅僅是因?yàn)槲覜](méi)有成為他所期許的兒子?為什么……
“我們要走了，老爺?！卑⒗镎f(shuō)。