《柯南脫口秀》第54期:約會的辦法

He said the app works almost as well as his old method,going up to any woman and saying,Hi,I'm Leonardo Dicaprio. 他說這款應(yīng)用軟件跟他以前泡妞的辦法幾乎一樣好 就是對任何女人自我介紹說 我是列奧納多·迪卡普里奧

Let's do this.Let's do this now.That's probably even more than what he does.He probably goes-you.Yeah. 我們來一炮吧 這就來吧 或許這都有點多余了 他大概就 你 嗯

That's what I do when I'm out in the town.I'm like you,come here.And they're like who are you? 我出去玩時就這么做 我就說 你 過來 對方說 你是誰啊

Over the weekend here in Los Angeles,Justin BIeber crashed a high school prom. 周末期間 洛杉磯 賈斯汀·比伯突然出現(xiàn)在一所高中的舞會上

Not only that,he won homecoming queen.That's a true story.Cuckoo,cuckoo. 不僅如此 他還贏得了返校節(jié)王后的名號 真的 布谷 布谷

That cuckoo clock won't go away,Andy! 那臺布谷鐘就是不肯走開 安迪

One thing I find,I watch a lot of television.It's better than talking to my kids. 我經(jīng)常看電視 比跟孩子聊天好玩多了

That's emotionally complicated.It's easy.I just stare and it happens.Your kids are pretty dull.Worse thing ever. 那是多么需要情商的事啊 這更簡單 我就看著就行了 你的孩子挺無聊的 簡直糟糕透頂

Now one thing I find helpful when I'm watching TV is that little info button on the cable romote. 我看電視時 有樣?xùn)|西很好用 就是遙控器的信息鍵

You know the one I'm talking about,you push it and it brings up the screen that tells you what you need to know about the show you're watching. 大家知道的 按下鍵 會出現(xiàn)屏幕 顯示關(guān)于你正在收看的節(jié)目的信息

Which is helpful because there are 100,000 shows out there.You want to know what the hell is going on,right? 這很有用 現(xiàn)在的節(jié)目太多了 你想了解究竟在看什么

So I thought we should look at info buttons result in a piece we call what am I watching? 所以我想跟大家一起看看一些信息鍵內(nèi)容 這一節(jié)就叫做 我在看什么