生活大爆炸 第五季:第2集 佩妮的免費沙發(fā)(上)
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What are you doing?
你干嘛呢
Oh, uh, Priya's calling in a few minutes on Skype,
普麗婭一會要跟我用Skype視頻
and we are gonna have a dinner date.
我們準備共進晚餐
It's 8 o'clock in the morning in Mumbai.
現在是孟買時間早上八點
How can she have dinner?
她怎么就吃起晚飯來了
Fine, whatever.Priya will be having breakfast.
好吧 隨你怎么說 那普麗婭就吃早餐好了
All right, so technically it's not a dinner date.
好吧 所以嚴格來講你們倆不是共進晚餐
I suppose you could call it a, uh, dinfast date.
也許你勉強可以把這稱為共進早晚餐
But if you did, you'd open yourself to peer-based mocking, such as,Hey, Leonard, how was your dinfast with Priya last night?
不過你要是真這么叫的話 你肯定會被別人笑死 人家肯定會說 萊納德 你昨晚跟普麗婭的早晚餐吃的好嗎
That doesn't sound like mocking.
聽起來不像是在笑話我呀
You didn't let me finish.Dinfast.
我還沒說完呢 早晚餐
Are those soy-based candles?
那是大豆蠟的蠟燭嗎
I don't know. Why?
不知道 怎么了
Paraffin candles may contain carcinogens.
石蠟蠟燭可能含有致癌物
Unless lung cancer is the ambiance you were going for at your dinfast. Dinfast.
當然啦 你要是想吃頓早晚餐 還搭上肺癌的話 我也不攔你 早晚餐
Listen, I don't want to be rude,
我不想無禮
but Priya's gonna be calling any minute, so...
可是普麗婭隨時都會打來
Oh, yes, Priya.
對哦 普麗婭
Leonard, you know I make a point of never interfering in your personal affairs.
萊納德 你知道我從來都不干涉你的私事
Yes, I've always admired that about you.
沒錯 我也一直很欣賞你這點
As well you should.But I'm going to make an exception here.
那是當然但是我這次要破例了
Oh, good.
又來了
Priya has moved back to India to pursue her law career.
普麗婭回印度去發(fā)展自己的法律事業(yè)
Instead of desperately trying to keep this intercontinental relationship alive,you could use that time to take up a hobby.
你與其花這些時間絕望地掙扎費勁心思地保持這段跨洲戀情 你還不如找點別的興趣愛好呢
A hobby?
興趣愛好
Yes.I read recently about a fellow in Kansas with an enormous ball of twine.
沒錯 我最近得知堪薩斯州一個家伙 拿麻繩團了一個巨大的球
I bet you could give him a run for his money.
我認為你可以跟他一比高下
You know, some people might say that it's great that we're trying to make things work long distance.They'd say things like,Love is stronger than the miles between you.
你知道嗎 有些人可能會說 我們倆保持這種異地戀是精神可嘉的事 他們會說 愛情不會被你們倆之間的距離所打敗
When I rise to power, those people will be sterilized.
等有一天我掌權了 我肯定會滅掉這幫人
You video-chat with Amy all the time.How is this different?
你也整天跟艾米視頻呀 咱倆干的事有什么不同
Don't you like Amy?
你不喜歡艾米嗎
Of course I like Amy.
我當然喜歡艾米啦
Well, there's the difference.
可我不喜歡普麗婭呀
Excuse me, that's Priya.
不好意思 普麗婭打來了
Hi, Leonard.
萊納德
Hey, honey.
親愛的
I miss you.
我好想你
Oh, I miss you, too.
我也好想你
I miss the old days when your romantic partners could be returned to the video store.
我懷念以前愛情伴侶們 能退回錄像店的日子
Thanks for letting me stay here while Leonard Skypes with his girlfriend.
謝謝你讓我待在這這樣我就不用看著萊納德跟他女朋友視頻了
Oh, it's no problem.
小意思
It's actually kind of nice.You reading, me reading.We're like an old married couple.
這種感覺還挺不錯的呢 你在看書 我也在看書 咱倆就像一對老夫老妻似的
If we were an old married couple, the wife would serve iced tea and snickerdoodles.
咱倆要真是老夫老妻的話 妻子這個時候就會端上凍檸茶和曲奇餅了
I don't have iced tea and snickerdoodles.
我家沒有凍檸茶和曲奇餅
A good wife would go to the store.
盡職的妻子就會去商店買
I want a divorce.
我要離婚
Good. On the way to see the lawyer,
很好 你去找律師的路上
pick up some tea and cookies.
別忘了買點凍檸茶和曲奇餅
I must say, I am enjoying your new chair.
我還真得說 我挺喜歡你這張新椅子的
It's great, isn't it?
舒服吧
It is.Aligns the lumbar,cradles the coccyx, balances the buttocks.
沒錯 符合腰椎曲線 支撐住了尾骨 還平衡了臀部
This is a chair worthy of the name.
這椅子還真對得起它的名字
What name?
什么名字
Chair.
椅子呀
Oh, all right, well, I'm glad you like it.I mean, I still can't get over the fact someone just threw it away.
好吧 你喜歡就好 我還是想不通 怎么有人就忍心把它給扔了呢
What?
你說什么
Yeah, it was just sitting on the street.I paid a homeless guy ten bucks to help me get it up here.
就是說呀 這椅子就被丟在路上 我給了個流浪漢十塊錢 讓他幫我把這張椅子搬上來的
Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
哦天吶 哦天吶
What is wrong?
你怎么啦
I've been sitting in garbage!
我剛坐在垃圾上了
Sheldon, take it easy.
謝爾頓 淡定嘛
You take it easy! I need to use your shower.
你去淡定吧 我得去趟浴室
I went into this marriage with so much hope.
我當年結婚的時候還是太過樂觀了
There's a wet Band-Aid on the shower floor!
浴室地板上有張濕創(chuàng)口貼
Our whole universe was in a hot dense state,then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started. Wait...
我們的宇宙進入了極熱的高濃度狀態(tài)，后來，140億年前它開始擴張。等等……
The Earth began to cool,the autotrophs began to drool,neanderthals developed tools, we built a wall (we built the pyramids),
地球開始冷卻，自養(yǎng)生物開始繁殖,穴居人學會使用工具，我們開始建墻（我們還建了金字塔）
Math, science, history, unraveling the mysteries,That all started with the big bang!bang!
數學、科學、歷史解開了宇宙之謎。這一切從宇宙大爆炸開始。
This is fun.I've never used a hydraulic thermoforming press before.
真有意思 我還從來沒用過熱成型液壓機呢
Pretty sweet, huh? This little baby set the university back 175 grand.
很贊吧 這個小玩意兒花了學校十七萬五千刀
That's three minutes.Shall we see what we got? Hang on
三分鐘到了 讓我們看看成果如何 馬上好
Oh, yeah.This is one good-looking panini.
哦也 這真是個有型的三明治
Hand me the tuna melt.Thank you.
把金槍魚三明治給我 謝謝
How's it going with the long-distance love affair?
你那跨國異地戀怎么樣啦
Not easy, but we're making it work.
不容易啊 但我倆正在努力
When you say "Making it work," does that include doing the cyber nasty?
你這句"正在努力"包不包括玩些線上耍流氓啊
What?
什么
You know, the virtual pickle tickle.
你懂的 就是虛擬的很黃很暴力的那種啊
The digital... bow-chicka-bow-bow.
數字化的嘿嘿咻咻
Come on, dude. This is my sister you're talking about.
拜托 伙計 你在說我妹啊
Hey, Leonard jiggling his junk at her through a webcam has got to be easier for you to deal with than him actually touching her with it.
喂 對你來說 萊納德在攝像頭里對著她抖那貨 總要好過他當著她的面拿那貨戳她吧
There's no junk jiggling. We just talk.
我沒那么猥瑣 我們就是聊天而已
Are you insane?
你瘋了吧
With high-speed Internet, you have at your fingertips the greatest advancement in the field of sex since the invention of the washcloth.
有了高速互聯網 你的指尖下 就是繼小手帕之后性愛領域的(注: 小手帕是擼sir之友) 最偉大的進步啊
I can't do that.
我不能那么做
Well, if you don't,you're gonna lose Priya to some fancy guy in a turban who grew up with Kama Sutra coloring books.
好吧 你要是不這么做你就是把普麗婭拱手讓給某個 從小看《印度愛經》插圖版長大的頭巾男了
How can you be so racist?
你怎么能這么種族歧視呢
Oh, come on, tell me I'm wrong.
拜托 我哪句說錯了
Oh, Leonard, good.There you are.
萊納德 很好 找到你了
I need you to check my head for chair lice.
我需要你來檢查我頭上有沒有虱子
I did it last night, I'm not doing it again.
我昨晚查過了 我不能再犯傻了
Just his head, right?
沒檢查別的地兒 對吧
I don't want to talk about it.
我不想聊這事兒
You didn't catch bugs from Penny's chair.
佩妮椅子上的蟲子沒跑到你身上
Yes, I did.
不對 有蟲子
And now they're cavorting at the base of my hair follicles like dancing hippies at the Redwood National Forest.
現在它們在我的發(fā)根毛囊里歡呼雀躍 就像在紅木國家森林公園里跳舞
Sheldon, you do this all the time.You fixate on some crazy idea and then blow it way out of proportion.
謝爾頓 你老是這樣 你總是糾結于某個傻乎乎的想法然后無限制地放大
Name one time I've ever done that.
請舉一個例子
How about when you put GPS trackers in your garbage because you were convinced North Korean spies were stealing your doodles?
比如上次你把GPS追蹤器放進垃圾桶里 就因為你堅信朝鮮間諜 在偷你的草稿紙
The chicken nuggets you were sure were human nuggets.
還有你堅信是人肉做的雞塊
The strangely-shaped cloud that was following you around town.
還有那朵奇形怪狀的在城里老跟蹤你的云
The time you put on my shirt by mistake and were convinced you'd started growing again.
還有那次你錯穿了我的T恤 還以為自己又開始長個兒了
I said, "Name one."You really need to work on your listening skills.
我說的是 "舉一個例子" 你的聽力真得練練了
Penny.Penny. Penny.
佩妮 佩妮 佩妮
Yello.You need to remove that chair from the building.It's a health hazard.
你得把那個椅子從樓里搬出去 它是個衛(wèi)生隱患
Okay, relax. I took off the slipcovers, had them dry-cleaned and then fumigated the cushions.
好吧 淡定吧 我把家具套給拆下來 送去干洗了 坐墊也熏蒸消毒了
Really?
真的嗎
Yeah. It's cleaner than my couch.Found half a Hot Pocket in there.
必須的 它現在比我的沙發(fā)還干凈 我還在里面找到了半個雞蛋灌餅呢
It certainly looks okay. Has a strong toxic chemical smell.That's reassuring.
看起來還不錯有一股強烈的有毒化學藥劑味 真讓人安心啊
Why don't you give it a try, Sheldon?
坐上去試試唄 謝爾頓
All right.
好吧
It is a comfortable chair.
這椅子挺舒服
Why don't you just admit you overreacted?
你為啥不承認你之前反應過激了呢
No, thank you.
不必了 多謝
It's like living with a Chihuahua.
簡直像跟個吉娃娃一起住一樣
Penny. Penny. Penny.
佩妮 佩妮 佩妮
What's up, buttercup?
有事嗎 小毛孩
You have to get rid of the chair.
你必須把那椅子扔了
Nope.
不。
Penny. Penny. Penny.
佩妮 佩妮 佩妮
What's the word, hummingbird?
想嘰歪啥呀 小蜂鳥
For your safety, please wait in my apartment as I call the authorities so they may remove the chair of death.
為你安全考量 請到我們那等著 讓我報警請他們搬走這死亡之椅
No.
不要
Penny! Penny! Penny!
佩妮 佩妮 佩妮
What's the gist, physicist?
有何指示 小物理學家
Under my authority as a self-appointed member of the Centers for Disease Control street team......these premises are condemned.
作為本街道疾控中心 自封的一員 我宣布 此房屋應報廢
As a man with a keen sense of style,I must tell you, that chair does not work with the room.
作為有著敏銳時尚感的達人 我必須說 那椅子跟你家一點都不配
Penny!Penny!
佩妮 佩妮
Ah...
啊……
Penny.
佩妮
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