The silence of men in general is overtalked about and overcriticized. To be sure, men never open up as much as women want them to, but there is a wordless understanding in which we function fairly well especially in friendships.
I believe, in fact, that most women would prefer a man to be glumly uncommunicative than to [1] spill his guts at the drop of a hat.
The push for men to express their feelings presumes that we have feelings, and we do have a few, but they remain submerged, and the [2] airing of them often violates their authenticity.
I am no biologist, but my guess is that the male human animal was programmed for silence. I would go so far as to argue that men were programmed to be isolated from one another and that aloneness is our natural state. Silence in male friendships is our way of being alone with each other.
Once men have established a friendship, that itself is the word. The affection is obvious, at least to us. A main component of our silence is an appreciation of the obvious.
overtalk // v. 過多地談?wù)?
overcriticize // v. 過分地指責(zé)
wordless // adj. 無言的
glumly // adv. 陰郁地
uncommunicative // adj. 沉默寡言的
submerge // v. 淹沒
violate // v. 破壞
authenticity // n. 真實(shí)性
biologist// n. 生物學(xué)家
isolate // v. (使)孤立
affection //n. 友愛
component // n. 成分
男人的沉默往往被過多地談?wù)撉疫^分指責(zé)了。可以肯定的是,男人從未像女人所希望的那樣開誠布公地說出自己的心里話,但我們卻能很好地運(yùn)用無言的理解,尤其是在維持彼此的友誼的過程中。
我相信事實(shí)上大多數(shù)女人都寧愿男人郁郁寡歡不言不語,而不喜歡男人就像竹筒倒豆子,什么都說。
男人被認(rèn)定為應(yīng)表達(dá)感情,這就是他們表達(dá)情感的推動(dòng)力。不錯(cuò),我們確實(shí)有一些,但隱而不露,若要表達(dá)出來就會(huì)破壞其真實(shí)性。
我不是生物學(xué)家,但我猜想男人這種動(dòng)物天生就是沉默寡言的。我甚至認(rèn)為男人天生就是彼此孤立的,孤獨(dú)是我們的自然狀態(tài)。男人間的友誼表現(xiàn)為沉默寡言,正是我們彼此獨(dú)自生活方式的表現(xiàn)。
一旦男人間建立起友誼,友誼本身就已說明了一切。情感是明顯的,至少對(duì)我們來說,我們沉默的一個(gè)主要組成部分就是對(duì)這明顯情感的欣賞。
增值英語
1. spill one’s guts本意是“告密”,和”spill the beans”意思相近,但是后者包含“不慎泄露風(fēng)聲”的意思,而前者則是刻意泄露。“ At the drop of a hat”是“突然”的意思。在這里,“spill his guts at the drop of a hat”指一個(gè)人藏不住心里的話,經(jīng)常不經(jīng)覺地就把許多話告訴別人。
2. airing是由air派生出來的,作名詞用時(shí)是“風(fēng)干”的意思。它同時(shí)也是air的動(dòng)名詞,有“張揚(yáng)”的意思。在這個(gè)句子中,airing指代的也就是feeling,即感情的張揚(yáng)。