英國文化：那5個讓國人大呼“任性”的英倫日常

1) HOW THE BRITS GREET

1) 英倫“任性”日常之摟摟抱抱

Hugging is a societal norm in the UK as a way of greeting people: for family, friends and even acquaintances. It is a common sight to see people of all ages wrapping their arms around each other and ending with an affectionate rub or pat on the back. This is still a line of intimacy that most Chinese aren’t willing to cross, and is an act reserved for special moments for those with a close relationship, although it is becoming more casualin younger generations. A kiss on the cheek would be even more unthought of as a greeting gesture.

在腐國，擁抱早已是人們互相問好的一種習(xí)慣性方式：家人、朋友甚至是一般熟人，沒有見面不抱一個的。不論老少，人們常常是一見面就互相用手臂纏繞對方一番，之后再送上背部深情撫摸或輕拍。而在天朝，盡管擁抱問好在年輕人中間越來越簡單隨便，但對大多數(shù)中國人來說，這樣的親密接觸仍舊是一道跨不過去的心檻，交往甚密的人們之間且在特別場合才會有這樣的行為。擁抱尚且如此，頰上一吻以示問候?qū)藖碚f更是“聞所未聞”，比任性還要任性了。

2) HOW THE BRITS COMMUNICATE

2) 英倫“任性”日常之“不就是不”

For most Brits, no means no. For the Chinese, you may have to gauge if the no is out of politeness or modesty and whether it is an imploration for further persuasion. As children in China, we were taught to always say no when asked if we wanted something, and only with repeated questioning accompanied with comments such as ‘no need to be so polite’ may you finally give in and accept. For the Brits, they’ll take your answer for what it is and move on, and it might be difficult to grasp that there are such long-winded ways of saying yes.

對大多數(shù)英國人來說，不，就是不。但對中國人來說，卻得先思忖一番這個“不”是出于禮貌呢還是謙虛呢，或者這是對方在暗示自己再來一發(fā)軟磨硬泡?在中國，我們從小都會被大人教育，不管別人問我們想不想要什么，我們都得說“不”。除非是在別人不斷詢問死纏爛打，還嚷嚷著“不用客氣，不用客氣”的時候，我們才可以妥協(xié)?？蓪τ藖碚f，你說“不”，那就是“不”，不必猶疑;中國人這種用“不”說“是”的方法可是有些拐彎抹角、難以把握呢。

3) HOW THE BRITS ADDRESS EACH OTHER

3) 英倫“任性”日常之直呼其名

Brits are much more likely to be on first name basis with each other. People are comfortable and willing for those even much younger than themselves to refer to them by their given name, whereas in China this may be considered impolite. At medical school, I can be on first name basis with my tutors and doctors who I am familiar with despite them being much more senior than me. In China, I wouldn’t think to address anyone in that position, no matter how familiar I am with them, without their title such as teacher, professor, doctor or so forth as is expected. Socially, I am more likely to refer to my parent’s British friends by their first name and their Chinese friends as ‘Aunty’ (ah yi) and ‘Uncle’ (shu shu). Similarly, I’ve known a lot of my British friends to refer to relatives of their parents generations by first names, whereas in Chinese there are specific titles for each of your parents siblings in relation to their age that you need to refer them by.

英國人之間，一般更可能使用名字互相稱呼。那些年輕許多的后輩對自己直呼其名，人們也不覺得不適，甚至反而愿意被這樣稱呼，但這在中國肯定是不禮貌行為。在醫(yī)學(xué)院里，我對相熟的老師教授們都以名稱呼，不管他們歲數(shù)比我大多少。但在中國，我可不敢這樣做，就算我和老師們十分熟悉，我也不會不守規(guī)矩，不用頭銜如老師、教授、博士等稱呼他們。對我父母的英國朋友，我也是直呼其名，但是對他們的中國朋友，我就得叫“阿姨”“叔叔”。和我一樣，我認識的許多英國朋友都會直接用名字稱呼自己父母一輩的親戚，但是在漢語里，根據(jù)不同輩分等級，每一個自己父母的兄弟姐妹都需要用特殊名銜來稱呼。

4) HOW THE BRITS EAT

4) 英倫“任性”日常之吃飯付錢都矜持

British etiquette dictates that eating should be done as quietly as possible, which means with your mouth closed, preventing cutlery from knocking against the plate and refraining from noisy chewing. In China, it is usually acceptable to lift the bowl and use chopsticks to push food into your mouth and make slurping noises – in some cases this can be seen as a sign of good appetite and appreciation of the food. When eating out, for the Chinese it is necessary to argue over the bill and insist on paying whereas in the UK, unless someone has blatantly stated they are paying, it is natural to split the bill. This includes situations where someone is hosting: being host in China (or ‘qing ke’) makes you responsible for the bill, which is not necessarily so in the UK. Furthermore, the Chinese also find it to be a funny phenomenon to see the calculator at the dining table as is often done in the UK. As stated, the Chinese don’t often split the bill and when they do, it would be almost shameful not to process it through mental arithmetics.

在英倫餐桌禮儀中，用餐時一定要安靜安靜再安靜，也就是說，嘴要閉好，餐具不要碰觸餐盤并且咀嚼不能出聲。在中國，端起碗來、用筷子輔助往嘴里塞食物、邊吃邊吸溜等等卻都是可以接受的，有時候還會被當做是意味著胃口好、享受美食的動作。中國人下館子的時候，為了照單全付一桌酒席，人們經(jīng)?；ハ酄巿?zhí)，還吵上一架;但在英國，除非有人鐵板釘釘?shù)芈暶髯约赫埧?，大家一般都會自覺AA。這也包括我們中國人說的“請客”：在中國，“請客”就意味著你買單，但是在英國可不一定。除此之外，中國人還對腐國人餐桌上的計算器大感新奇、忍俊不禁。正如上文，中國人一般不會AA;但是他們真正要AA的時候——不能心算賬單?那簡直是一大恥辱。

5) HOW THE BRITS SPEND

5) 英倫“任性”日常之不講價與倒貼錢

Whereas the ability to haggle is practically a life-skill necessity in China, the concept of bargaining is virtually non-existent in the UK. The closest you’ll get, save for a few niche markets, is probably bidding on eBay (the English equivalent of Taobao). Furthermore, paying an additional service charge or ‘tipping’ is common practice in the UK – for restaurants, hairdressers, hotels and so forth. In contrast, if you tip in China, you’ve basically confirmed your status as a tourist. This is likely to stem from the fact that in the UK service is one of the most expensive commodities, whereas in the China, it is still one of the cheapest.

在中國，會講價已經(jīng)差不多是一門必須的生存技能，但在英國，連“講價”這個概念都還幾乎了無蹤跡。除了少數(shù)的市場，最多也就是在eBay(英國版的淘寶)上小試牛刀講講價。英國人不光不會省錢，還習(xí)慣多付服務(wù)費或者是“付小費”——在餐館、理發(fā)店、酒店等場所，基本都是如此。相比之下，如果你在中國付小費，后果只有一個：你的旅游觀光身份基本曝光。這其實也與在英國服務(wù)是最為昂貴的商品之一的情況有關(guān)，而在中國卻相反。