如果你足夠愛她,你就能做到
Recently, my friend John lost his wife Janet. For eight years she fought against cancer, but in the end her sickness had the last word.
最近,我的朋友約翰失去了他的妻子珍妮特。珍妮特與癌癥抗?fàn)幜税四?,最終還是讓病魔奪走了生命。
One day John took out a folded piece of paper from his wallet. He had found it, so he told me, when he tidied up some drawers at home. It was a small love letter Janet had written. The note could look like a school girl' s scrawls about her dream guy. All that was missing was a drawing of a heart with the names John and Janet written in it. But the small letter was written by a woman who had had seven children; a woman who fought for her life and who probably only had a few months left to live.
一天,約翰從他的錢夾里拿出一張折疊著的紙。他告訴我,他是在家里收拾一些抽屜時(shí)發(fā)現(xiàn)這張紙的。它是珍妮特寫的一封短小的情書。這紙條看上去有點(diǎn)像是一個(gè)女學(xué)生信手寫寫她的夢中情人,只是沒有畫一顆寫著約翰和珍妮特名字的紅心罷了。但這短短的情書卻是一個(gè)有著七個(gè)孩子的女人寫的;這個(gè)女人在為她的生命而戰(zhàn)斗,恐怕沒有幾個(gè)月就要離開人世了。
It was a beautiful recipe for how to keep a marriage together.
這封情書道出了讓婚姻長久的美麗秘訣。
Janet' s description of her husband begins thus: “Loved me. Took care of me. Worried about me.”
珍妮特是這樣開始描述她的丈夫的:“愛我。照顧我。為我擔(dān)憂。”
John showed great consideration for Janet. Sometimes he came home in the evening to find her in the middle of one of those depressions cancer patients so often get. In no time he got her into the car and drove her to her favourite restaurant.
約翰對(duì)珍妮特體貼入微。有時(shí)他傍晚回到家時(shí)發(fā)現(xiàn)珍妮特正陷入癌癥患者經(jīng)常遭受的情緒低谷,他會(huì)馬上開車帶她去她極為喜歡的餐館吃飯。
"Helped me when I was ill,” the next line reads. Perhaps Janet wrote this while the cancer was in one of the horrible and wonderful lulls. Where everything is — almost — as it used to be, before the sickness broke out, and where it doesn' t hurt to hope that everything is over, maybe forever.
情書的下一行是:“在我生病期間幫助我?!币苍S珍妮特寫下這句話時(shí)正逢癌癥處于那種即可怕又美妙的暫時(shí)平穩(wěn)期。這期間,病痛沒有爆發(fā),一切——幾乎——如從前一般;這時(shí)希望一切都過去了,也許永遠(yuǎn)地過去了,又有何妨?!
"Forgave me a lot.”
“時(shí)常體諒我?!?BR>
"Stood by my side.”
“支持我。”
And a piece of good advice for everyone who looks on giving constructive criticism as a kind of sacred duty: “Always praising.”
“總是贊揚(yáng)我。”對(duì)于任何一個(gè)視給予建設(shè)性的批評(píng)為某種神圣責(zé)任的人來說,這真是不錯(cuò)的忠告。
"Made sure I had everything I needed,” she goes on to write.
“確保我擁有我所需要的每樣?xùn)|西,”她接著寫道。
After that she has turned over the paper and added: “Warmth. Humour. Kindness. Thoughtfulness.” And then she writes about the husband she has lived with and loved the most of her life: “Always there for me when I needed you.”
接下來,她還翻過紙?jiān)诒趁胬^續(xù)寫:“熱情、幽默、仁慈、周到。”之后,她這樣描寫她在生命的大部分時(shí)光里與之一起生活并深深愛戀的丈夫:“當(dāng)我需要你時(shí),你總是在我身旁?!?BR>
The last words she wrote sum up all the others: “Good friend.”
最后兩個(gè)字總結(jié)了她所寫的全部:“好友。”
I stand beside John now, and cannot pretend to know how it feels to lose someone who is as close to me as Janet was to him. I need to hear what he has to say.
現(xiàn)在我就站在約翰的身邊,無法裝作我知道失去某個(gè)和我很親近的人,像約翰失去珍妮特那樣親近的人,是什么滋味兒。我需要聽聽他會(huì)說些什么。
"John,” I ask. “How do you stick together with someone through 38 years — not to mention the sickness? How do I know if I can bear to stand by my wife' s side if she becomes sick one day?”
“約翰,”我問道,“你怎么能與某個(gè)人廝守38年——更不用說還有病魔的糾纏?我怎么能知道如果我的妻子哪天病了,我能夠忍受得住,一直陪伴在她身邊呢?”
"You can,” he says quietly. “If you love her enough, you can.”
“你能,”他平靜地說,“如果你足夠愛她,你就能做到?!?BR>
【京翰·合肥鳳凰城校區(qū)地址】
合肥市蜀山區(qū),潛山路與淠河路交口,向東50米底商1-2層京翰教育。
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