Okay. I'll -- I'll get that.
得 您待著 我-我來接
Hello?
喂
Hey, Manny's getting his outfit together
喂 曼尼正在準備
for the dance tonight.
他今晚舞會的行頭
I was just taking some supplies out to the car.
我正在把舞會用品往車上裝呢
Isn't this exciting -- the boys' first dance?
太激動了 小伙子們的第一次舞會耶
Greatest day of my life.
簡直是我人生中最美好的一天
Does Phil have a green pocket square for him?
話說菲爾有綠色的裝飾方巾不
Teal!
青色
Teal.
好吧 青色的
I don't know. I don't think Phil's
我不知道 不過我不覺得菲爾是個
really a pocket-square kind of a guy.
會往西服口袋里搞什么裝飾方巾的人哎
Why don't we conference in Mitch?
咱還是問問米奇吧
Ay! Look. This might work.
看 介個玩意兒行不
Well, except that it's turquoise...
這是藍綠色的誒...
oh, and a bra?!
還是個胸罩
Do you think the kids in my village had pocket squares?
你覺得俺們村兒里的孩子會戴裝飾方巾嗎
Here we go with the village.
又扯什么你們村兒
- Dad, are you still there? - Unfortunately, yes.
-爸 還在聽不 -很不幸 我還在
Please ask Claire what time
幫我問下克萊爾
do I need to be at the school to help set up.
我該幾點去學校幫忙啊
Gloria wants to know --
歌洛莉亞想問--
No, I heard. I heard.
不用重復 我聽著了 聽著了
Um, tell her thank you so much,
告訴她很感謝她這么熱心
but we have all the help we could possibly need,
但我們的人手已經(jīng)足夠了
and she doesn't even have to come tonight
其實如果她不想來的話
- if she doesn't want to. - Claire said --
她壓根兒都不用出現(xiàn)-克萊爾說
I heard.
我聽見了
Hello?
喂
Oh, hey, Mitch!
喂 米奇
- Where are you? - Oh, we're at the park.
你在哪兒-我們在公園呢
You would not believe
你肯定不敢相信
how some of these people dress their kids.
某些家長是怎么打扮自己孩子的
Lily's friend just pulled a Britney Spears
莉莉的小伙伴剛剛從沙坑玩具車里
getting out of a sandbox car.
拽出一個迷你版布蘭妮
So, dad's on the line.
老爸也在聽著呢
Do you he a teal pocket square for Manny?
你那兒有沒有青色的裝飾方巾啊 曼尼要用
Cam, Manny needs a teal pocket square.
小卡 曼尼想問你借青色的裝飾方巾
Oh, I've got teal, I've got aqua, i've got sea foam...
我有青色的 水藍色的 淺藍色的
- Yeah, Cam's got one. - Cam's got one.
小卡啥都有-小卡有
Yes!
太棒了
Oh, you know what? I lent it to Andre.
我想起來了 我借給安德瑞了
Ah. He lent it to Andre.
不過他借給安德瑞了
Flag on the play.
情況有變
What's that mean?
你說啥
What's that mean?!
啥意思
Now I got to go to the mall.
看來我得去趟商場了
Is this okay?
這身怎么樣
Oh, hey! Luke has to go to the mall, too.
太巧了 盧克也要去商場耶
What?
為啥
Phil.
菲爾
Let's go, Incredible Hulk.
咱走吧 綠巨人
Uh, is that ur little girl over there -- Lily?
那個叫莉莉小姑娘是你家的不
- Yes. Look at her. - Yes.
-是啊 看她多可愛 -是啊
Uh, well, this is a little bit awkward,
這事說起來有點尷尬
but she bit Tyler.
不過她剛剛咬了我家泰勒
Oh, no.
不是吧
Oh, my goodness.
我的老天爺
I -- I don't even know what to say.
我真不知道該說什么好
She's never done anything like that before.
她從沒這么干過
How did it happen?
到底怎么回事
I don't know. I didn't see.
我也不知道 我沒看見
It's time to play everyone's favorite game.
大家都愛來這套
Let's blame the gay dads!
都怪基佬爸爸
You know who had straight parents?
你知道異性戀都生出什么貨色嗎
Adolf Hitler.
希特勒
Charles Manson.
殺人狂曼森
- Shall we go on? - Naomi Campbell.
咱還繼續(xù)不-愛打人的超模娜奧米
I-I know it happened.
但我知道肯定有這么回事
He's got bite marks on his arm.
他胳膊上還有牙印呢
Oh, gosh, someone really sunk their teeth into you, huh?
老天 還真有人咬你了哈
It's 'cause you're such a yummy little guy!
你真是個可口的小家伙
Yes!
是啊
Our daughter didn't do that.
才不是我家閨女干的呢
- But he said -- - Right.
但是他說-好吧
He's probably just confused.
沒準兒是他搞錯了
You know who I bet did it, though?
你猜我認為是誰干的
Billy. Rhymes with Lily.
是比利 念起來和莉莉差不多
Plus, he is very aggressive.
而且 他可好斗了
His babysitter's right over there.
他家保姆就在那兒呢
She's -- she's not much of a disciplinarian.
她 她不太會管孩子
Because I can assure you,
我可以跟你保證
if our child did something like this,
要是我家閨女咬人了
亞洲人愛吃大米 大米是白色的 白色與大米指不分彼此 此處指黏著莉莉
we would be on her like white on rice.
我們肯定會寸步不離地看著她
And I know that sounds a little bit like a racial slur,
我知道這聽起來貌似有點種族歧視
because we're white and she presumably likes rice,
因為我們是白人 而她八成愛吃米飯
but I didn't intend it that way.
不過我真不是故意說成這樣的
Ah. Finally. There's a spot.
終于有車位了
Guys, I am just bursting with pride right now.
小伙子們 我現(xiàn)在好為你們驕傲
Your first dance.
這可是你們第一次舞會啊
Soon you're gonna be men.
很快你們也成男子漢了
I want you to know there's more to be a man
你們得知道 男子漢可不會
than just shopping for fancy outfits.
整天想著買漂亮衣服
Yep. Pretty soon, you get some hair on your chest,
沒錯 很快你們就要長出胸毛
you start answering the phone,
接電話時
people don't think you're ladies.
人家也不會以為你們是女人了
Come on, today, Miss Daisy.
別磨嘰了 戴茜小姐
Actually, Miss Daisy was the one being driven,
事實上 戴茜小姐是坐車的
not the one driving.
不是開車的
Never saw it.
沒看過
It's called "Driving Miss Daisy".
那片兒叫《為戴茜小姐開車》
You got a real lip on you today. You know that?
我說你今天話挺多啊
Hey! That was our spot!
喂 那是我們的車位
What are you doing?
你在干啥啊
You're gonna let him snake your spot?
你就這么把車位拱手讓人了啊
Not worth it.
沒啥大不了的
Boys, here's the only thing you got to know
孩子們 要想當男子漢
about being a man --
你們必須得記住
never let someone take what is yours.
永遠不能讓別人搶走你的東西
Unless it's just a parking spot
除非那只是個微不足道的小車位
and there's plenty of others.
車位多的是嘛
That's sweet, Phil. You ought to write that down.
好貼心哦 菲爾 真該把這寫下來
You got any lipstick in your purse?
你包里肯定還帶著口紅呢吧 娘娘腔
I love Jay. Are you kidding me?
你開玩笑嗎 我很愛杰的
He's my boy.
他是我的哥們
Yeah, he gives me a hard time,
當然 他經(jīng)常和我過不去
but that's the deal with a father-in-law.
可這就是和岳父的相處之道
The key is,
關鍵在于
I never let him see just how much it devastates me.
我絕不向他妥協(xié)
It's "Dunphy."
這念"鄧菲"
That's what I said -- "Dumphy."
我就這么念的 "傻菲"
No, not "dumb".
不對 不是"傻"
Dunphy.
是"鄧菲"
Dumphy.
傻菲
- Say "done". - Done.
-跟我念"鄧" -鄧
- Say "fee". - Fee.
-跟我念"菲" -菲
- "Done-fee". - "Dumphy".
"鄧菲"-"傻菲"
All right, just bring it this way?
好的 往這邊挪點
This way -- there it is.
這邊 就這了
Perfect. Thank you. Perfect.
很好 謝謝 很完美
Cla-a-aire?
克萊 克萊爾
What?-Can You ask Gus to fix that light?
怎么了-你能讓格斯去修一下那盞燈嗎
I asked him, but he just growled at me.
我剛?cè)フ埶麕兔?他卻對著我大聲咆哮
Oh, gosh. Okay.
噢 天吶 好吧
Gus, stop scaring Bethenny and fix the light, please?
格斯 別嚇唬貝瑟妮了 請你快去把燈修了吧
Don't make me come over there.
別逼我
I'm busy. You fix it.
我忙得很呢 要修自己去修吧
Is this because I said
你這樣是不是就因為
i wouldn't come to the dance with you?
我不肯跟你一起跳舞
Gus, I'm a married woman. People would talk.
格斯 我已為人妻了 別人會說閑話的
One dance with me, you'd forget all about him.
只要和我銷魂一舞 保證你忘乎所以
Yeah, I already have a husband who doesn't fix lights.
好吧 有一個不肯修燈的老公已經(jīng)夠讓我受的了
Please?
求你了
Thank you so much.
非常感謝
This school would literally fall apart without you.
你簡直就是這所學校的頂梁柱
還說不上"頂梁柱"啦 可
Well, I don't know about "literally",but...
Ihola, hola! I'm here!
大家好 我來咯
Oh, you came anyway.
噢 你還是來了
That's great.
太好了
I think it's great, too.
?
我感覺也很好
A few weeks ago, they asked for someone
幾周前 校方在征集
to be in charge of the school dance,
愿意負責這次舞會的人
and I volunteered.
我報名了
The school asks for volunteers
學校這次召集志愿者
so that everybody will feel included,
就是為了能讓所有人參與其中
but who are they kidding?
可他們在開什么國際大玩笑
They want me to do it.
我才是這項工作的不二人選
I've put on every school dance since Haley was 12.
自從海莉十二歲開始 學校里所有的舞會都是我負責的
It's my thing.
這是我的專長
They made us co-chairs,
校方讓我們當聯(lián)席主席
which means we're supposed to do everything together,
就是為了讓我們合作
but Claire won't take any of my ideas.
可克萊爾從不接受我的建議
She suggested an "Arabian nights" theme.
她居然提議"天方夜譚"為舞會主題
Isn't it a little soon?
對小孩子來說是不是太早了
Okay. Um, hey, everybody?
好吧 大伙注意了
Do you know Gloria, Manny's mom?
你們認識歌洛莉亞嗎 曼尼的母親
She's here to help us out today.
她是來幫我們忙的
I'm the co-chair.
我是聯(lián)席主席
So, the kids are gonna be here in two hours,
兩個小時以后孩子們就到了
so everybody back to work.
大伙趕緊工作吧
Everybody back to work.
大伙趕緊工作吧
I just said that.
這話我說過了
And I just co-said it.
我這是在"聯(lián)說"
I mean, the nerve of that lady accusing Lily?
那女士居然厚顏無恥的來指責莉莉
Mm. Well, you know what? You can't change people, Cam.
江山易改 本性難移 小卡
I mean, we just have to rise above.
我們只能盡量不去受他們影響
What happened?
怎么了
She bit me.
她咬了我一口
Are you serious?
你說真的嗎
Ohh! Ah! She did it again!
她又咬我了
It's like "Twilight" back here!
這簡直就是《暮光之城》
No! No ice cream for you, Billy,
不行 沒有雪糕吃 比利
because the lady say you biting!
因為那個阿姨說你到處咬人
Okay. Okay. Go. Go.
好吧 快走 快走
Yeah.-Go,Go,go.
好的-快 快 快
Drive.
快開車
Are you sure this is teal?
你確定這個是青色嗎
Cause I'm starting to get a real strong green thing here.
因為我開始覺得這個有點偏綠色
That's the fluorescent lights.
那是日光燈的反射效果
Do you mind if I walk this over to lamps galore?
我可以把這個拿到燈光明亮點的地方看看嗎
I need you to worry about this less.
你別老擔心這個了
Guess who fit into the suit on the mannequin
猜猜誰正好能穿下人體模特身上的衣服
and saved us 20%?
還給我們打了八折
Here's something I didn't know about mannequins --
我一直不明白 人體模特
they don't have a wiener.
怎么就沒有"香腸"呢
What the heck is that?
那是什么鬼東西
It's a nicer word for "penis".
那是"小雞雞"的婉轉(zhuǎn)說法
No, I mean, what the heck is this?
不是 我是說 這是什么鬼東西
It's a tie.
領帶啊
It's teal.
可這是青色的
I don't care.
那又怎樣
I just grabbed the first one I saw.
我第一眼看見就拿了
Well, grab a different one.
去拿個別的
No!
不要
Now I like it.
我現(xiàn)在喜歡上它了
Uh, I think we were here first.
我們先到的 別插隊
I just have one thing. I'm in a big rush.
我只買一樣東西 我趕時間
So are we.
我們也趕時間
That's fine. Go ahead.
沒關系 你先結賬吧
Seriously?
你搞什么
Jay, it's not a big deal.
杰 這沒什么大不了的
And can you give me the sale prices
你能幫我查一下
for some things I bought last week?
上周我買的那些東西的價格嘛
Oh, for god's sake!
噢 我滴神吶
Now, this is what i'm talking about, boys.
正如我說的那樣
You give people an inch, they'll run all over you.
做人要強硬 不然別人會得寸進尺
Or you could just be nice -- pay it forward.
或者你也可以做個好人 讓愛傳遞
They don't make movies out of bad ideas.
別老是給他們灌輸不良思想
All I know is you got to fight for what you want.
我只知道你們要努力爭奪自己想要的東西
If there's one job available,
要是只有一個就業(yè)崗位
this guy just got it,
而你們不去爭取 就會像那樣被人奪走
and they go hungry at the "Dumphys'".
你們就在"傻菲"家等著挨餓吧
Dunphys'.
是"鄧菲"啦
Okay, I don't get it. Why is she biting?
我還是搞不懂 她干嗎要咬人
Lily, why are you biting?
莉莉 你干嗎要咬人
She's not biting. She's teething.
她才不是咬人呢 她這是在磨牙
On people!
在人身上磨牙
All right, if she starts biting her play dates,
好了 要是她再這樣繼續(xù)咬她的玩伴
she's gonna be a pariah.
她就會被人唾棄的
Try "piranha".
食人鯧也挺可愛的
Really, cam?
你要這樣稱呼咱們的女兒嗎 小卡
It was right there.
一時口快
All right, you should also know that I in no way --
好吧 你也該知道我絕對
in no way -- blame you.
一點兒都沒怪你
- Well, thank you. Why would you blame me? - I don't.
-那多謝了 你為啥要怪我 -我沒有
Well, good, because I don't blame you.
好啊 因為我就沒怪你
Well, obviously.
明顯得很
Uh, okay, well, now I'm starting to feel the blame.
我覺得你又在怪我了
No. No. Don't -- it's...
沒 我沒有 好吧 是因為
it's just that you're with her all day.
整天都是你跟她在一起 你該教好她的
I have a daughter who bites and a partner who stings.
現(xiàn)在我有一個咬人的女兒和一個叮(激怒)人的老公
Okay. Okay, you want to know the truth?
好吧 你想知道真相嗎
Sometimes you've sent her some mixed signals.
你有時候會給她一些奇怪的暗示
I'm gonna bite your feet!
我要咬你的小腳丫
I'm gonna bite 'em right off!
我要把它們咬掉
Oh, I'm not the one who uses my teeth like a multi-tool.
哦 我可沒有把牙齒當瑞士軍刀來用
Here we go. Cookies for Lily...
好了 莉莉的餅干
...and wine for us.
我們的酒
Okay.
好吧
I can't believe you would equate --
我不敢相信你居然拿
Oh, don't bite my head off.
別把我的頭咬掉了
I'm not a pack of batteries.
我可不是電池
Un poquito mas aca. Es perfecto all.
往這邊移一點 這就對了
Ay, good. Bellissimo.
很好 棒極了
Why is this box here?!
這里怎么有個盒子
I am sorry -- we did,
實在抱歉 是我們放的
because we were moving the tables.
因為我們要搬桌子
Well, why are you moving the tables?
那你為啥要搬桌子
So the kids have more space to dance.
這樣孩子們就有更大的空間跳舞了
It's better this way.
這樣更好
Is it really, Gloria?
真的嗎 歌洛莉亞
Because right now it kind of just looks like
因為現(xiàn)在這里看起來就是
a clump of tables and a big open space.
一堆桌子和一大片空地
Look, I'm sorry,
聽著 我很抱歉
but we've always done it this way,
但是我們以前就這么做的
and I think it's gonna throw people off
我認為如果你把桌子搬來搬去
if you move them around.
會把人們嚇跑的
Oh, my god, these tables look great!
天啊 這些桌子看上去真不錯
Who did this?
誰弄的
I did!
是我耶
I love it!
愛死了
Hello.
你好啊
We haven't been properly introduced.
咱們還沒自我介紹呢
- I'm Gloria. - I'm Bethenny.
我叫歌洛莉亞-我叫貝瑟妮
I don't know if anybody's ever told you this,
不知是否有人跟你說過
but you're really pretty.
你很漂亮
No. No, Bethenny. No one's ever told her that.
不 不 貝瑟妮 沒人跟她這么說過
I am seriously freaking out
這些桌子真超乎
about these tables!
我的想象
You know what? Let's just put a pin in
這樣好了 我們在要放桌子的地方
where we're gonna put the tables.
做個記號
Yes, we're keeping the tables!
好啊 桌子就這樣放
So what else can I do?
還有什么需要我?guī)兔γ?/p>
Um...you can...
你可以
help me with the chairs.
幫我拿一下凳子
Okay.
好吧
We need a lot of them.
我們需要很多凳子
They're under the stage right...here.
凳子就放在臺下 就在這兒
There you go.
請吧
It's like dirty and dark there, no?
這里還真是又黑又臟的說
Yeah, I know. Bummer, right?
我知道 不太爽是吧
Off you go.
進去吧
Smells funny, Claire!
味道有點怪啊 克萊爾
So sorry. Keep goin'!
對不住了 繼續(xù)往里爬
What?
又咋了嘛
We needed chairs.
我們真的需要凳子
里面到處是螞蟻
明天我就把這都打掃干凈
不 在孩子們來之前就必須打掃干凈
說的是呢
What are you guys talking about?
你們講啥呢
No, nothing. He was just saying
?
沒啥 他說
how much he loves the tables.
他愛死這些桌子了
If I had the receipt,
要是我有收據(jù)
I wouldn't need you to look it up.
我就用不著叫你查了
At this rate, I'm going to miss the first dance...
照這樣下去 第一輪舞我是跳不成了
at my wedding!
我說的是我以后的婚禮
I thought he only had one item.
他不是說他只有一件東西要買單嗎
Tell your dad, if it were up to me,
跟你老爹說去 要是當初聽我的
we'd have been in and out of here in about 10 minutes.
我們十分鐘之內(nèi)就可以買完走人了
You mentioned that.
你說過了
And I'll probably mention it again,
我可能還會再說一次
because, thanks to someone,
因為托某人的福
we're gonna be here for a while.
我們還得繼續(xù)耗在這兒
Yeah, I get it.
好吧 我懂了
You know, Luke, you should order that suit in a larger size,
知道嗎 盧克 你應該買套大號的西服
- because by the time we get out of here - I...get...it.
因為等我們結賬走人的時候[盧克該長大了] -我懂了
Pay for the suit.
這是西裝錢
Where the hell are you going?
你這是要去哪
Luke needs...socks.
盧克還需要 襪子
Make 'em teal!
要青色的
You're playing a very dangerous game.
你是承心惹我哈
Hey, boys...
嘿 筒子們
look who it is --
看看誰來了
the guy that stole our parking spot.
那個占了我們停車位的家伙
- Are you going to hit him? - I'd totally hit him.
你要去扁他么-是我的話就肯定扁他
I'm not gonna hit him,
我不會扁他
but I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind.
但我要跟他講道理
Now, boys, pay attention -- you want to be men,
筒子們 注意了 要想當爺們兒
this is how you handle a jerk like this.
就得學我這樣對付這些痞子
Hey, chief?
嘿 兄弟
You know, you stole our parking space today.
你今天搶了我們的停車位
- What? - That's right.
啥-就是這么回事
I was waiting for the parking space,
我正在等停車位
You sneaked right in there --
你溜過去就把位給占了
that make you feel like a big man?
你以為你爸李剛啊
Did I? I didn't even notice.
有嗎 我根本沒注意到
That's no excuse.
這借口沒啥說服力
I'm really sorry.
我真的很抱歉
My dog died today.
我的狗今天死了
I had to put him to sleep.
我不得不給他安樂死
14 years,
十四年了
he was all I had.
我們倆相依為命
Now I can't stand the thought
現(xiàn)在我每每想起回家
of going back to my empty apartment,
就獨守空巢 眼淚就嘩嘩的
So I just keep wandering around the mall.
所以我就不停地跑商場來晃悠
You know what? Forget about the...
這樣好了 忘了
spot.
停車位[也指"圓點"]的事吧
Oh, god!
天啊
That was his name!
他名字就是圓點
Do not hit him.
請不要扁他
Oasis for men?
噴點男士香水
That's funny.
有意思
You made that sound like a question,
你好像是在問我
then you didn't wait for me to answer.
卻又不給我機會回答
What?-Here,let me show you.
什么-讓哥教教你
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You go --
看 你是這么說的
You go, "Oasis for men"?
你說 噴點 男士香水
You see what I mean? You went, "Oasis for men"?
懂不 你說了 噴點 男士香水
You should have said, "Oasis for men"?
你應該說 要噴點男士香水嗎
Then I'd go, "Yeah, give me two".
然后我回答 給哥來兩下
But instead, you went, "Oasis for men".
但是你說 噴點 男士香水
- Okay. I get it. - You see what I mean?
好吧-你滴明白
- I-I get it. I get it. - No, I'm not sure you do!
明白了-我看未必
You sprayed before "Men"!
你沒說完“男士香水”就噴我
You went, "Oasis for men".
你說 噴點 男士香水
- Okay. Okay. - Men!
好好好-叫你噴
- Men! Men! - Stop it! Stop it!
我噴-別鬧了
- Men! Men! Men! Men! - Stop it!
我再噴-求你了
- Men! Men! Men! Men! - Stop it!
我繼續(xù)噴-不要啊
Men! Men! Men! Men! Men!
我噴 我噴 我噴噴噴
Hey, Phil.
菲爾
I don't know what happened.
我不知道我是咋了
I just...
我就
I...
我
I don't know what happened.
我真的不知道
Look, I might've come down on you a little bit hard today.
我今天對你是有點小苛刻
I'm sorry.
對不起
I remember pretending to go look for some socks...
我記得我假裝去買襪子
I mean, it's, uh, my fault.
是我錯了
I pushed your buttons.
我把你惹急了
My father-in-law was the same way with me.
我老丈人以前也這么對我
He was horrible.
那糟老頭真可怕
Grandpa Lucas? He was a sweetheart.
盧卡斯外公嗎 他是大好人呀
Yeah, after the stroke mellowed him out good.
中風以后他才良心發(fā)現(xiàn)
Before? An animal.
那之前 簡直不是人啊
We named Luke after him.
盧克這名字就是為了紀念他的
Everything I did was wrong.
我做啥都錯
If I said it was white, he'd say it was black.
我說白 他非得說黑
Although he never said anything was black
盡管他從不用黑色這個詞
cause he was a pretty big racist.
他是個變態(tài)的種族歧視
I wear his watch.
我還戴著他的表
I hated him. Hated him.
死老頭子 恨死他了
And I was thinking -- I don't know --
我在想 我不知道
I don't want you to think the same way about me.
希望你對我不是這種感情
You ever think about maybe
那你有想過
not being a jerk to me so much?
對我有愛一些嗎
Now, see, you got to stop taking that stuff personally.
別以為我只是針對你
I'm like that with everybody.
我對所有人都那樣
I'm tough!
我不好相處
And...Mean.
還尖酸刻薄
I don't like to take guff!
不喜歡別人唧唧歪歪
Or people's feelings into consideration.
也不考慮別人的感受
Okay, okay.
好吧
I can't swear my way's the right way.
我不敢說我一定是對的
I see you smiling, skipping around,
看你那副追歡賣笑 上竄下跳的熊樣
and I think sometimes -- I don't know --
不知怎么 我有時會想
maybe the boys would be better off
男孩們像你這樣
if they were a little bit more like you.
也許還自在些
You know, skipping burns more calories than running.
知道嗎 跳比跑燃燒的卡路里更多
That's --
那是
We're done here.
先說到這兒吧
Oh, hey, listen.
對了
He didn't tell me, but what'd you do to that guy, huh?
那人沒告訴我 你做啥壞事了
Did you get him?
給他點顏色瞧瞧了
Yeah, I sprayed him with cologne.
我對著他噴了點香水
I'm sorry I asked.
當我沒問
No, but, like, a lot of cologne.
噴了很多香水呢
I just, like, got way up in there.
我追著他一路小跑啊
Good boy.
真有你的
Did you find anything yet?
有啥發(fā)現(xiàn)
Yes, there's a whole section on biting
這個媽咪論壇上
on this Mommy forum.
有咬人討論專區(qū)
Oh, good. What does it say?
不錯 上面怎么說
Uh, "My son was biting,
我兒子咬人
我就找了個陌生人訓他
so I got a stranger to yell at him”.
Being disciplined by someone else outside the family
外人對他的訓斥讓他好怕怕
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00:14:26,015 --> 00:14:26,925
scared him into stopping.
以后也不咬人了
- Idiots! - Cam!
很傻很天真-小卡
What? I am not hiring some hobo
咋滴了 我才不會雇什么刁民
to come over here and traumatize my child.
來傷我家小乖乖的心
She's already prone to flashbacks,
她已經(jīng)有段不堪回首的記憶了
if you know what I mean.
你懂的
Yeah, you know she didn't fight in Vietnam, right?
她在越南又沒參過戰(zhàn)
I don't know anything anymore.
我不管 我不管
What else does it say?
還有啥
Okay, well, this one says,
好吧 這位樓主說
When my daughter bit her brother,
我女兒咬她弟弟時
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00:14:42,105 --> 00:14:44,765
I put a pinch of pepper in her mouth.
我在她嘴里放了點胡椒
She cried and cried, but she never bit again.
她哭個不停 不過從此再不咬人了
Smiley face.
還有個笑臉表情
Oh, well, the smiley face makes it okay.
這笑得還有理了
I waterboarded our toddler --
給我囡囡一點小懲罰
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00:14:52,175 --> 00:14:53,615
lol!
哇咔咔
Well, all right, what do you suggest we do?
那你說 我們怎么辦
That we log off the Spanish inquisition website
退出這個西班牙知道網(wǎng)
and handle this with love.
用愛來感化她
Okay, Lily...
聽我唱 莉莉
take a bite of an apple, take a bite of a pear
咬一口蘋果 咬一口梨
take a bite of the cookie that you left over there
咬一口面前的小曲奇
Here's one thing you should never do.
有些東西你不能咬
Don't bite Taylor or Brandon or Sue
泰勒 布蘭登 蘇小小
because people aren't food. People aren't food
人不能咬呀 人不能咬
Your friends will run away
你咬了朋友
if they're scared of being chewed
?
他們就會被嚇跑
and as a side note,
再給一句小忠告
private parts are private
私密部位保護好
Well...problem solved.
你真賢惠 問題解決了
I know you're being sarcastic,
我知道你在挖苦我
but you don't know that it's not.
你懂啥 還沒結束呢
Ow! Honey.
哎喲 我的乖乖喲
- Did she just bite you again? - No.
她又咬你了嗎-沒有
That is it. I am getting the pepper!
我受夠了 我去拿胡椒來
N -- no, you are not.
不 你不能拿
Cam, you're not doing her any favors by being soft.
小卡 這么寵她對她沒好處
Oh, well, then, why don't you just skip the pepper,
干脆你也甭拿胡椒了
I'll get some pliers, and we'll pull her teeth now!
我去找鉗子 咱倆速度拔掉她的牙
Play relax! It's a seasoning.
淡定 不就是個調(diào)味品嗎
Okay. Well, then, why don't you try some?
要不你嘗一個
Stop.-No. Try a little.
別鬧了-來嘛
- Stop it. Stop it, Cam. Stop it. - No, try a little bit.
-小卡 別這樣 -嘗一個嘛
Don't you hit me. Here. Put some in there.
你還敢打我 看我不塞你嘴里
- No! Well... - Ow! You bit me! Mm!
不要-你咬我
Why don't you sing me a song about it?
你為什么不為我唱首關于這個的歌
Oh, look at you two in your matching ties!
看你倆的領帶多搭啊
- Don't get me started. - Ohh, come here.
別跟我提這事-過來
Luke, sweetie, aryou wearing cologne?
盧克 親愛的 你噴古龍水了嗎
No. Dad attacked the perfume guy
沒有 老爸攻擊了推銷香水的家伙
and then hugged me.
又擁抱了我
I saw the boys in those adorable little suits,
我看到男孩們穿著可愛的西裝
and it made me realize this dance is about them.
然后我意識到這舞臺就是他們的
It's not about me
與我無關
and my petty little competition with...
與我跟歌洛莉亞之間
with Gloria.
小小的競爭無關
Just look at the walls in here.
看那邊的墻
Who wears that to a kids' dance?
誰穿成那樣參加兒童舞會啊
I know. She looks amazing.
沒錯 她看起來太贊了
Okay, I'm gonna slow things down
好了 我要用首懷舊老歌
with a blast from the past
為我們的女伴們
for our chaperones.
舒緩下節(jié)奏
Oh, my god.
我的天哪
No, I'm fine.
沒事 我沒事
I'm -- I'm fine.
我 我沒事
I'm fine. I'm fine.
我沒事 我沒事
I need a paper towel.
我要紙巾
I'm sorry. I didn't see you.
不好意思 我沒看見你
No...
是啊
Of course you didn't. Of course you didn't.
你當然沒看見我了 當然了
Cause it's gloria's night.
因為這是歌洛莉亞之夜
That's right.
沒錯
It's all about Gloria, Gloria, Gloria!
全是關于歌洛莉亞 歌洛莉亞
When you're done getting married...
你談夠情說夠愛以后
maybe you can mop this up a little.
就把這地方拖干凈點
What was that?
她怎么了
It's this damn uniform.
都是這該死的制服
Okay, we need to talk.
好吧 我們得談談
No. I am fine. I do not need to talk.
不 我很好 我不需要談
Well, you've been pushing me away the whole week.
你這星期一直在排斥我
You've been fighting all my ideas.
你一直反對我的意見
That's because this is my thing, Gloria.
因為這是我的事 歌洛莉亞
Why can't it be my thing, too, Claire?
為什么不能也是我的事 克萊爾
Because everything is your thing!
因為所有的事都與你有關
This -- this is the one thing that was my thing.
這是唯一一件我自己的事
This is my only thing.
這是我唯一的事
Oh my god, this is my only thing.
我的天 這是我唯一的事
And then you come along and you steal my thunder
然后你穿著你的緊身裙過來
with your tight dresses and your great ideas.
用你那些很棒的主意 搶了我的風頭
I was the one that all the moms looked up to.
我是那個受到所有媽媽尊敬的人
I was the only one that Gus liked.
我是格斯唯一喜歡的人
Ay! Please.
拜托
You like him so much, you can keep him.
你那么喜歡他 你可以留著他
It's not the same now that I know he likes you.
現(xiàn)在不一樣了 我知道他喜歡你
That sounds really insane,
這聽上去真的很瘋
but this isn't actually about gus.
但這跟格斯沒關系
Really? Because you've been talking a lot about him.
是嗎 因為你一直在談論他
Gloria, Gus is a symbol.
歌洛莉亞 格斯只是一個符號
A sex symbol?
性符號嗎
Stop it, Gloria. I'm already crying.
別說了 歌洛莉亞 我都哭了
Claire...I didn't come here to steal your thunder.
克萊爾 我不是來這兒搶你風頭的
Your thunder is your thunder,
你的就是你的
and my thunder is my thunder.
我的就是我的
I know. It's just that god gave you so much thunder.
我知道 只是上帝給你的比較多
Yeah, maybe too much.
可能是有點太多了
I hate how those women look at me.
我討厭那些女人看我的眼神
You think I don't know what they're thinking?
你以為我不知道她們是怎么想的嗎
Ah, here comes the hot one with the big boobies
喲 來了個性感的波霸
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00:19:10,515 --> 00:19:12,505
that is gonna steal my husband.
搞不好會搶了我老公
And maybe they don't let their kids play with Manny.
也許她們都不會讓自己的孩子跟曼尼玩
I volunteer because I want them to see
我自愿來這是因為我想讓他們看看
that there's so much more to me.
我還有更多其他的內(nèi)涵
Why didn't you tell me that?
你為什么沒跟我說過這些
Maybe for the same reason you didn't tell me
也許就跟你沒告訴我
you had a weird thing for Gus --
你對格斯有奇怪的感覺一樣
It's embarrassing.
這很尷尬的
Okay. I am sorry.
好吧 我很抱歉
I made this whole thing
我把整件事
into some ridiculous competition,
變成了可笑的競爭
and...I'm pathetic.
而且 我真可悲
You're not pathetic.
你不可悲
Okay, that's a little bit sad.
好吧 是有點令人難過
We like to think we're so smart
我們喜歡自認為聰明
and we have all the answers.
自認為自己能解決一切問題
And we want to pass all that on to our children.
而且我們希望可以把這些傳授給孩子們
But...
但是
if you scratch beneath the surface,
如果你不只停留在膚淺的表面上的話
you don't have to dig very deep to find the kid you were.
用不著深究就能看到你自己兒時的樣子
Which is why it's kind of crazy
這也正是瘋狂的地方
that now we're raising kids of our own.
現(xiàn)在我們自己都有孩子了
You know what? This is a milestone.
你知道嗎 這是一個里程碑
We're accepting that our little angel isn't perfect.
我們接受我們的小天使并不是那么完美
That's right. And it's okay.
是的 這沒關系
I-I take it back --
我 我收回剛才的話
she is perfect.
她很完美
But I guess that's the real circle of life.
但是我猜這才是生命真正的輪回
Your parents faked their way through it,
你父母這樣長大
you fake your way through it,
你也這樣長大
and, hopefully,
那么 我希望
you don't raise a serial killer.
你沒有養(yǎng)了一個連環(huán)殺人犯
That's not funny.
這不好笑
I am so sorry.
我感到很抱歉
No,just come over watching movie
不 把所有事都拋在腦后
put the whole thing behind you.
過來看電影吧
Okay, see you in a bit.
好的 一會見
That was Longines. He's in a very bad place.
是浪琴 他現(xiàn)在心情很差
Oh, no. What happened?
不是吧 怎么了
Well, apparently some maniac went crazy at the mall
有個瘋子在商場發(fā)飆了
and attacked him with oasis for men.
用男士香水襲擊了他
Oh. Well, I think we all knew that day was coming.
好吧 我想我們都知道早晚會有這么一天
All right. Wish me luck.
好吧 祝我好運
Good luck.
祝你好運
Okay, honey.
好了 親愛的
Please don't hurt daddy.
拜托不要咬老爸
All right.
好了
Ahh.
來 張嘴