時差N小時:酗酒妻子對大嘴丈夫的不滿

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親愛的安妮：

My 21-year-old niece has been dealing with adrinking problem since high school. I also have adrinking problem that only my husband and kidsknow about. My husband, who was having a serioustalk with my niece, decided it was in her bestinterest to tell her about my problem.

我21歲的侄女在高中就染上了酗酒惡習。我也有酗酒的毛病，但只有我的丈夫和孩子知道這一點。我的丈夫和我的侄女進行了一次嚴肅的談話，決定告訴她我酗酒的秘密。他認為這樣做對她有好處。

I am very private and want no one to know about my drinking because of the stigma attached.I don't want my parents or siblings to have to worry about me or look at me differently.

我非常自私。我希望沒有人知道我的酗酒惡習，因為我認為那是一種恥辱。我不希望我的父母或兄弟姐妹們?yōu)槲覔?，也不希望他們以異樣的眼光看我?/p>

I can't be certain my niece will blab this information to everyone, but somehow, I think she willeventually. Do you think my husband had good reason to tell her? I don't see how it wouldhelp, and it sure made me angry. Shouldn't such personal information come directly from me? - Upset Wife

我不知道我侄女會不會把我的這個秘密告訴每個人。但我覺得她最終會的。你認為我的丈夫有權利告訴她我的秘密嗎?我不知道這對我的侄女會否有所幫助，但這肯定讓我很生氣。這樣的個人秘密難不應只屬于我一人嗎? —— 一個忐忑不安的妻子

Dear Upset:

親愛的忐忑女士：

Your husband should have asked you first if it was okay to give your niece this information, butyou can't put the cat back in the bag. It is very possible that learning her aunt has a similarproblem was comforting to your niece and will inspire her to work harder. We think having thisinformation will do more good than harm, and we hope you will forgive your husband so you canbe a source of encouragement to your niece.

你的丈夫在向你侄女透露這個秘密之前，確實應該征詢你的意見。但另一方面，你總不能把秘密守一輩子吧?也許當你的侄女知道她的嬸嬸也有同樣的困擾時，她會稍感平衡，并將激勵她更加努力地工作。我們認為，將這個秘密告訴你的侄女，總會利大于弊。我們希望你會原諒你的丈夫，還希望你可以給你的侄女予以鼓勵。