Here’s drunkard’s argument in favor of heavy drinking.
We would learn more about human bihavior if we paid closer attention to the laws at work in the animal kingdom.
“Only the fittest survive” is a law that is apparent everywhere in the natural world. Human beings could certainly benefit from a close study of how this law operates among, for example, the wildbuffalo.
A herd of buffalo moves only as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest animals at the back that are killed first. This is natural selection, and it is good for the herd. The general speed and health of the group keeps improving with regularkilling of the weaker memebers.
The same process of survival of the fittest is to be observed by looking closely at the human brain, which can operate only as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive consumption of alcohol, as we all know, kills brain cells. Just like the less vigorous buffalo at the back of the herd, the weakest and slowest brain cells are destroyed first.
In this way the principles of natural selection become evident. Regular consumption of large amounts of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. It is therefore not suprising that one also feels smarter after drinking several glasses of beer.