艾倫脫口秀254:坑爹的聯(lián)想功能

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I just wanted to say I love you and the person writes back,Oh babe, I love you too so much

我只想說我愛你 那個人回 哦 寶貝兒 我也愛你

If I could, I'd buy you a casket then Gah A castle Damn auto correct Way to ruin a moment

如果我能 我想給你買口棺材 然后 啊 是城堡 坑爹的聯(lián)想功能 害死我了

I definitely do not want you in a casket.Hello like it just gone.castle not casket

我絕不是想送你進棺材 還在么 好像氣沒影了 是城堡不是棺材啊

imagine you are just just gone about your day on this phone and your dad

想象一下你今天都要過完了 然后你爸爸

you got text from your dad and it says this Your mom and I are going to porce next month

你收到你爸爸的短信 寫著 你媽媽和我打算下個月離婚

and then the person says what why call me please and then I wrote Disney and this phone changed it

那個人回 啊 怎么會 速回電 然后 我寫的迪士尼 手機給改了

we are going to Disney it's not porce no

我們要去的是迪士尼 不是離婚 不是

this is from somebody who is texting their aunt and it seems normal at first

這條是一個人給阿姨發(fā)的短信 一開始很正常

hi aunt Liz are you still going to pick us at 6:15 for the movie tonight

嗨 Liz阿姨 你六點十五分來接我們去看電影嗎

Hi Michelle, Yes I will be there in about 45 minutes.I'm just heating up some ladybits for your father

Michelle你好 我四十五分鐘后到 我正和你爸爸嘿咻嘿咻熱身呢

Wow I definitely meant leftovers is what they meant

啊呀 我絕對說的是熱剩菜 他們這是在搞什么啊

my question about this one is why does the phone know the word ladybits.where does that come from

我的問題是 手機怎么會知道“Ladybits”這個詞的 從哪冒出來的啊

I love these if you have any good please sent it to me.sent them to my ladybits if you like or my website

我愛這些故事 如果你有比較經典的 就發(fā)給我 可以的話 發(fā)給我的“l(fā)adybits” 或者我的網站

when we come back our very first guest of season nine and possibly very naked Ashton Kutcher will be sitting right there

等我們回來的時候 第九季的首位嘉賓 很可能全裸出場的Ashton Kutcher將會坐在這里

英語脫口秀