生活大爆炸第二季01.The Bad Fish Paradigm (Bad Fish范式):Sheldon保守秘密四處搬家事件

[00:00.00]美劇MP3+LRC [00:00.16]******g is not technically yogurt, 知道了吧 你吃的這個(gè) 不算是真的酸奶酪 [00:02.28]because it doesn't have enough live acidophilus cultures. 因?yàn)槔锩鏇](méi)有足夠的 活的嗜酸培養(yǎng)菌 [00:04.92]It's really just ice milk with carrageenan added for thickness. 只不過(guò)是冰牛奶里加了點(diǎn) 角叉膠 增加粘稠度 [00:08.43]Oh,that's very interesting. 喔 真有意思哈 [00:10.54]It's also not pink and has no berries. 它也不真是粉紅色 也沒(méi)有天然漿果粒 [00:14.52]Yeah,but it doesn't really answer my question. 嗯 可這也沒(méi)有回答我的問(wèn)題吶 [00:17.02]What was your question again? 你問(wèn)的啥問(wèn)題? [00:18.56]Do you want some? 你要來(lái)點(diǎn)兒不? [00:21.75]Right. No. 對(duì)對(duì) 不用了 [00:22.71]- I'm lactose intolerant. - Right. - 我受不了乳糖的 - 對(duì)哦 [00:24.07]- So,gas. - Yeah,got it. - 吃了會(huì)放屁的 - 好吧 明白了 [00:27.22]Well... good night. 那么... 晚安了 [00:44.27]What are you doing? 你這是做什么呢? [00:45.55]Oh,there's a draft. 哦 那邊有陣風(fēng) [00:48.22]I didn't feel a draft. 我沒(méi)覺(jué)得有風(fēng)啊 [00:50.63]Why don't we just go into,uh,your... 那我們還是去... 你的... [00:53.78]Yeah,you know what,maybe we should slow things down a little. 我說(shuō) 也許我們不該那么著急 [00:56.68]No,no,I didn't mean to go into your apartment to go fast. 不 我不是說(shuō)要去你公寓 去急著干嘛干嘛 [00:59.53]No,I know. 當(dāng)然了 我知道 [01:01.55]I know what you meant,it's just... this is only our first date. 我知道你不是那意思 只是... 這才是咱倆第一次約會(huì) [01:04.45]Yeah,okay,sure,no problem. 嗯 好啊 沒(méi)問(wèn)題 [01:05.85]Why don't we just figure out where we're going and when we want to get there, 那我們就先想想 下次要去哪兒 準(zhǔn)備啥時(shí)候到那兒 [01:10.72]and then rate of speed equals distance over time. 這樣距離除以時(shí)間 就知道速度了唄 [01:16.52]Solve for R. 問(wèn)題解決 [01:19.53]Or we could just wing it. 我們也可以到時(shí)候再想嘛 [01:22.09]That might work,too. 那沒(méi)準(zhǔn)也行 [01:24.74]- Good night,Leonard. - Good night. - 晚安 Leonard - 晚安 [01:31.77]He's coming-- screensaver! 他來(lái)了 快上屏保! [01:38.39]Oh,hey,Leonard. How was your date? 嘿 Leonard 約會(huì)怎么樣哇? [01:42.23]Bite me. 要你管 [01:45.34]Sheldon,how could you just sit there and let them spy on me? Sheldon 你怎么能傻坐著 眼睜睜看他們監(jiān)視我呢? [01:48.88]They were clever,Leonard. 他們油菜啊 Leonard [01:49.89]They exploited my complete lack of interest in what you were doing. 他們完全明白 我對(duì)你那些破事兒 一點(diǎn)興趣沒(méi)有 [01:54.72]You should thank us. 你還該謝謝我們呢 [01:56.08]When future generations try to determine why your relationship with Penny crashed and burned, 要是后來(lái)人想弄明白 你和Penny的戀情為啥會(huì)土崩瓦解 [02:00.81]this right here is the black box. 這玩意兒就是黑匣子吶! [02:04.12]What are you talking about? The date went fine. 你胡說(shuō)什么 約會(huì)挺好的 [02:06.76]Dude,she said she wants to slow things down. 拜托 她都說(shuō)了 想要慢慢來(lái) [02:08.77]Okay,so she said she wants to slow things down. 好吧 她是說(shuō)了 想要慢慢來(lái) [02:11.89]It's like saying,"I'm really enjoying this meal. 意思差不多就是 "今天的晚餐我非常喜歡 [02:15.86]I'm going to slow down and savor it." 我得慢慢來(lái) 好好回味一下" [02:18.24]No,it's like,"This fish tastes bad, 才怪 她的意思是 "這魚(yú)真難吃死了 [02:21.61]so I'm gonna slow down and spit it out." 我得慢慢來(lái) 吐光了它" [02:27.66]- You being the fish. - I'm not the fish. - 這臭魚(yú)說(shuō)的就是你! - 我才不是這臭魚(yú)呢 [02:30.02]Oh,really? Did you make a second date? 真的? 你倆定了下一次約會(huì)嗎? [02:32.26]Well,no,we sort of decided to wing it. 這倒沒(méi)有... 我們說(shuō)好了 到時(shí)候再想 [02:34.16]Oh,even I know that's lame. 得了吧 連我都覺(jué)得這太遜了 [02:37.82]Okay,all right,let's assume your hypothesis. 行啊 咱就說(shuō)說(shuō)你的假設(shè) [02:40.50]We went to dinner,we talked,we laughed,we kissed. 我們一起去吃飯 有說(shuō)有笑 有吻有抱 [02:43.97]Where could I have possibly gone wrong? 這還能錯(cuò)到哪兒去啊? [02:45.83]Think back,Leonard. 你好好想想 Leonard [02:47.02]The littlest things can set women off. 再小的事情都能讓女人爆發(fā) [02:49.15]Like,"Hey,the waitress is hot,I bet we could get her to come home with us." 比方說(shuō) "嘿 這服務(wù)生真辣 我打賭 肯定能讓她跟咱回家" [02:54.03]Or,"How much does your mom weigh? 或者 "你媽媽有多重吶? [02:55.86]I want to know what I'm getting into." 我想知道我搭上的是啥樣的妞兒" [02:58.24]I didn't say anything like that. 這種話我才不會(huì)說(shuō) [02:59.66]Good,'cause they don't work. 很好 因?yàn)檫@么說(shuō)不管用 [03:02.55]They also don't care for it if you stare at them and hyperventilate. 她們也不關(guān)心 你是不是盯著她們 呼吸加速 [03:05.27]Sadly,that's my home run swing. 挺慘的 在我們家 這就像是家族傳統(tǒng) [03:08.34]Look,everything went fine. 我說(shuō) 一切都挺好的 [03:10.66]I didn't even have to refer to my impromptu conversation starters. 連事先準(zhǔn)備的一些開(kāi)場(chǎng)白都沒(méi)用到呢 [03:14.95]That woman across the hall is into me. 走廊對(duì)面那個(gè)女孩 就是喜歡我嘛 [03:17.80]Let's go to the tape. 咱還是看帶子吧 [03:21.35]Look at her reaction to the good night kiss. 你瞧她臨別一吻的時(shí)候 那反應(yīng) [03:23.72]No change in respiration,pupils un-dilated,no flushing of the chest. 呼吸平穩(wěn) 瞳孔沒(méi)有放大 胸口也沒(méi)啥起伏 [03:28.24]Nice close-up,by the way. 這特寫(xiě)鏡頭拍的真贊 [03:30.62]Interesting. Her jaws are clenched: no tongue access. 有意思嘿 她的下巴很緊 也沒(méi)有用舌頭 [03:33.82]Clearly a bad sign amongst mating humans. 對(duì)于尋偶期的人類來(lái)說(shuō) 這可不是啥好消息 [03:37.62]That's not a bad sign. 這怎么就不是好消息了 [03:39.26]Please,you might as well have been two iguana with no dewlap enlargement. 得了吧 還不如說(shuō)你們是兩只鬣蜥 只是喉部沒(méi)有垂肉罷了 [03:44.02]And the worst sign of all is you're here and not there. 最糟的就是 這會(huì)兒你不在她家 而在這里! [03:46.80]I'm not there because I'm taking things slow,which, 我不在她家 因?yàn)槲乙矝Q定慢慢來(lái) 這個(gè)... [03:50.95]by the way,compared to you guys,approaches warp speed. 跟你們比起來(lái) 都快接近星際速度了 [03:55.36]And take down that camera. 快把攝像頭給我撤了 [03:59.68]He was a lot more fun when he had no hope. 他心里沒(méi)牽沒(méi)掛的時(shí)候 真有意思多了 [04:05.34]Give him time. 給他點(diǎn)時(shí)間吧 [04:40.21]Oh,hi,Penny. [04:41.49]FYI,the hot water is inadequate on machine two,so colors only, 你好啊 Penny [04:43.49]順便說(shuō)句 2號(hào)機(jī)器的熱水不足 別深色淺色混著洗 [04:45.56]and four is still releasing the fabric softener too early in the cycle, [04:48.49]so I'd avoid using that for your delicates. 4號(hào)機(jī)器呢 洗衣程序中 還是會(huì)提前放出織物柔順劑 [04:50.24]Thanks. 所以你那些精致的衣服 還是別用那臺(tái)了 [04:52.24]謝了 [04:54.93]Oh,good Lord... [04:56.21]why don't you just take your clothes down to the river and beat them with a rock? 老天爺啊... [04:58.21]你還不如把衣服拿到河邊 擱在石頭上猛捶一陣 [05:04.66]Sheldon,can I ask you a question? [05:07.75]I would prefer that you not,but I won't go so far as to forbid it. Sheldon 我問(wèn)你個(gè)問(wèn)題行不? [05:09.75]我當(dāng)然最好你別問(wèn) 不過(guò)也不會(huì)阻止你 [05:12.22]All right,I heard yes,so... [05:15.28]Okay,here's my question. 那... 我就當(dāng)你同意了... [05:17.08]Has Leonard ever dated, you know,a regular girl? 我想問(wèn)問(wèn)你 [05:19.08]Leonard以前有沒(méi)有 跟正常的女孩子約會(huì)過(guò)? [05:22.96]Well,I assume you're not referring to digestive regularity. [05:24.96]我想你指的 應(yīng)該不是消化功能正常吧 [05:27.55]Because I've come to learn that such inquiries are inappropriate. [05:29.55]要是那樣的話 我想這問(wèn)題問(wèn)的不合適 [05:31.74]No,I meant,has he ever been involved with someone who wasn't a brainiac? [05:33.74]我是說(shuō) 他有沒(méi)有跟 沒(méi)那么大學(xué)問(wèn)的女孩子談過(guò)? [05:36.78]Well,a few years ago,he did go out with a woman who had a PhD in French literature. [05:38.78]話說(shuō)幾年前 他確實(shí)跟一個(gè) 學(xué)法國(guó)文學(xué)的女博士有過(guò)一段兒 [05:44.09]How is that not a brainiac? [05:46.19]Well,for one thing,she was French. 這還不算有大學(xué)問(wèn)? [05:48.19]理由一 她是法國(guó)人 [05:50.74]For another,it was literature. [05:52.74]理由二 她讀的是文學(xué) [05:59.37]So... [06:02.23]do you think that if Leonard and I keep dating,he'll eventually get bored with me? 那你覺(jué)得... [06:04.23]如果我和Leonard繼續(xù)好下去 他會(huì)不會(huì)有一天覺(jué)得我很沒(méi)勁啊? [06:12.98]- That depends. - On what? [06:15.51]- Do you have a working knowledge of quantum physics? - No. - 那得看情況 - 什么情況? [06:17.51]- 你懂量子物理嗎? - 不懂 [06:19.63]- Do you speak Klingon? - No. [06:21.63]- 你會(huì)說(shuō)克林貢語(yǔ)嗎?(星際迷航) - 不會(huì) [06:23.59]- You know any card tricks? - Okay,you know what... [06:25.59]- 你會(huì)耍牌嗎? - 行了 我說(shuō)... [06:28.46]I get it. [06:29.36]Leonard has no business being involved with a waitress-slash-actress 我明白了 [06:32.85]who felt so insecure that she lied to him about finishing community college. Leonard和一個(gè)服務(wù)員兼二流演員 沒(méi)有共同語(yǔ)言 [06:34.85]而且她還騙他說(shuō) 上完了社區(qū)大學(xué) 心里正發(fā)慌呢 [06:37.50]Why would you lie about that? [06:39.08]Well,he was going on and on about this college and that grad school,and I... 你為什么撒謊? [06:42.22]I didn't want him to think I was some kind of stupid loser. 他總是在說(shuō)這大學(xué)怎樣 那個(gè)研究生院怎么樣 我就... [06:44.22]我不想讓他覺(jué)得我很傻很衰嘛 [06:45.75]You thought the opposite of "stupid loser" was "community college graduate"? [06:47.75]你覺(jué)得"很傻很衰"的反義詞 是"社區(qū)大學(xué)畢業(yè)生"? [06:54.78]You know,there are a lot of successful people in this country who are community college graduates. [06:56.78]很多成功人士 都是從社區(qū)大學(xué)畢業(yè)的 [06:59.49]Yeah,but you are neither. [07:01.49]沒(méi)錯(cuò) 可你哪個(gè)都挨不上邊 [07:03.63]Right. Okay,look,this is between you and me. [07:06.04]You cannot tell Leonard any of this. 對(duì) 好吧 你得替我保密 [07:08.04]啥也不要告訴Leonard [07:10.30]- You're asking me to keep a secret? - Yeah. [07:13.30]Well,I'm sorry,but you would have had to express that desire before revealing the secret, - 你要我保守秘密? - 是的 [07:15.30]那真對(duì)不起了 你應(yīng)該在說(shuō)出秘密前 表達(dá)出要我保密的意思 [07:17.94]so that I could choose whether or not I wanted to accept the covenant of secret keeping. [07:19.94]我好選擇 到底要不要替你保密 [07:22.72]You can't impose a secret on an ex post facto basis. [07:24.72]你事后再說(shuō) 這怎么行呢 [07:27.54]What? [07:29.26]Secret keeping is a complicated endeavor. 什么? [07:31.68]One has to be concerned not only about what one says, 保守秘密是一項(xiàng)艱巨復(fù)雜的任務(wù) [07:34.14]but about facial expressions, autonomic reflexes. 不但要注意說(shuō)的話 [07:37.32]When I try to deceive,I myself have more nervous tics than a Lyme disease research facility. 還得注意面部表情 習(xí)慣性反應(yīng) [07:39.32]我說(shuō)謊的時(shí)候 因?yàn)榫o張產(chǎn)生的扁虱(tick) 比萊姆關(guān)節(jié)炎研究設(shè)備產(chǎn)生的還多 [07:48.82]It's a joke. [07:50.25]It relies on the homonymic relationship between "tick," 這是笑話啊 [07:52.49]the bloodsucking arachnid,and "tic," the involuntary muscular contraction. 同音詞嘛 "tick"是指 [07:54.49]吸血蜘蛛 而"tic"是無(wú)意識(shí)的肌肉痙攣 [08:01.06]I made it up myself. [08:03.06]我自己編的 [08:05.09]Okay,look,if Leonard finds out that I lied,I will absolutely die of embarrassment. [08:07.09]聽(tīng)著 如果Leonard發(fā)現(xiàn)我說(shuō)謊 我一定羞愧自盡了 [08:10.31]Physiologically impossible. [08:11.52]Oh,Sheldon,please. 生理學(xué)上講是不可能的 [08:13.37]Look,I am asking you as a friend. 哦 Sheldon 拜托 [08:16.76]So you're saying that friendship contains within it an inherent obligation to maintain confidences? 我是以朋友的名義請(qǐng)求你 [08:18.76]照你這么說(shuō) 朋友就要無(wú)條件的保守秘密? [08:21.83]Well,yeah. [08:23.52]Interesting. 是啊 [08:25.89]One more question,and perhaps I should have led with this. 有意思 [08:28.69]When did we become friends? 再一個(gè)問(wèn)題 或許應(yīng)該這樣問(wèn) [08:30.69]我們什么時(shí)候成朋友了? [08:33.15]i.e.,I couldn't become Green Lantern unless I was chosen by the Guardians of Oa, [08:35.15]也就是說(shuō) 要不被總部守護(hù)先知選中 我就成不了綠燈俠 (漫畫(huà)形象) [08:37.31]but given enough start-up capital and an adequate research facility,I could be Batman. [08:39.31]但如果給我足夠的啟動(dòng)資金和 足夠的科研設(shè)備 我就能成為蝙蝠俠 [08:46.32]- You could be Batman? - Sure. I'm Batman. See? [08:48.32]- 你能成為蝙蝠俠? - 當(dāng)然 我就是蝙蝠俠 看見(jiàn)沒(méi)? [08:53.12]- Hi,guys. - Hi,Penny. [08:55.12]- 嗨 伙計(jì)們 - 嗨 Penny [08:56.87]Penny,if you're not doing anything Friday night,I thought maybe we could go see a movie. [08:58.87]Penny 你周五晚上有空的話 我們?nèi)タ措娪鞍? [09:00.58]Oh,um,you know,I think I have the dinner shift on Friday. [09:03.56]Okay,what about Saturday? 呃 我周五晚上要輪班 [09:05.20]You know,I'm not sure; the manager hasn't posted the schedule yet. 好吧 周六呢? [09:08.35]- How about I let you know? - Great. 說(shuō)不準(zhǔn) 經(jīng)理還沒(méi)公布排班表呢 [09:10.48]So you just let me know when you know. Okay,so... - 出來(lái)了 我再告訴你? - 很好 [09:13.46]Oh,God,I am the bad fish. 那你知道了就告訴我 好的 那... [09:15.46]天吶 我就是那條臭魚(yú) [09:17.97]What did I do wrong? [09:19.72]Why are you asking me? 我哪做錯(cuò)了? [09:21.86]I have no information about your interactions with Penny other than what you have provided me, 你為什么問(wèn)我? [09:25.20]nor do I have any method of learning such things. 你和Penny的事兒 除了你已經(jīng)告訴我的 我啥也不知道 [09:27.20]我也沒(méi)有本事學(xué)到 [09:30.61]- What does that mean? - Nothing. [09:32.70]You seem to be implying an informational back-channel - 這話什么意思? - 沒(méi)什么 [09:35.11]between me and Penny where obviously none exists. 你說(shuō)的倒像是 我和Penny背地里通了氣 [09:37.43]No,I didn't. 很明顯 這是沒(méi)有的事 [09:38.47]I just think you need to be careful how you phrase things,sir. 沒(méi) 我沒(méi)覺(jué)得 [09:40.47]我想你要注意你的表達(dá)了 先生 [09:44.44]What's going on with you? [09:46.17]I might ask you the same question. 你怎么回事? [09:48.09]Why do you insist on attempting to drag me into matters which have nothing to do with me, 這問(wèn)題我也得問(wèn)問(wèn)你吧 [09:50.09]那些跟我無(wú)關(guān)的事兒 你何必非要把我扯進(jìn)去? [09:52.02]but exist between you and Penny, a person to whom I barely speak? [09:54.02]都是你和Penny之間的事 我跟她連話都不怎么說(shuō)的 [10:03.78]What's wrong with your face? [10:06.49]There's no reason to bring my looks into this. 你臉怎么了? [10:08.49]我臉這樣 沒(méi)啥原因 [10:10.83]- Good day,Leonard. - What [10:13.27]I said,"Good day." - 祝你今天過(guò)的愉快 Leonard - 什么? [10:15.27]我說(shuō) "祝你今天過(guò)的愉快" [10:18.42]Good day? [10:20.42]過(guò)的愉快? [10:22.03]Also today,we have a fresh-caught Alaska salmon, [10:24.44]and that's served with a teriyaki glaze and sticky rice. 今天還為您供應(yīng) 新鮮的阿拉斯加大馬哈魚(yú) [10:27.05]Our soup of the day is... 配上燒汁和糯米飯 [10:27.82]You must release me from my oath. 今天的湯是... [10:29.59]你必須將我從我的誓言中解放出來(lái) [10:33.11]Sheldon,I'm working. [10:35.50]Why don't you take a minute to decide? Sheldon 我在工作 [10:37.27]你們花幾分鐘決定一下吧 [10:39.75]I can't keep your secret,Penny. [10:41.35]I'm going to fold like an energy-based de novo protein in conformational space. 我不能保守你的秘密了 Penny [10:43.12]我就像構(gòu)象空間里 基于能量的內(nèi)源蛋白 要折疊起來(lái)了 (fold 也有失敗的意思) [10:46.97]Like a Renaissance tryptich. [10:49.12]Like a cheap suit. 就像是文藝復(fù)興時(shí)期的三聯(lián)畫(huà) (教堂祭壇上的飾物 兩翼可向內(nèi)折疊) [10:51.49]Look,why is it so hard for you to keep one little secret? 還有廉價(jià)的西裝 [10:54.29]I'm constitutionally incapable. 你保守個(gè)小秘密 咋就這么難呢? [10:56.37]That's why I was refused clearance for a very prestigious government research fellowship 我天生就保守不住! [10:58.14]所以我上次申請(qǐng)那項(xiàng)高端政府研究獎(jiǎng)學(xué)金 證明開(kāi)不出來(lái) [11:00.25]at a secret military supercollider located beneath a fake agricultural station [11:02.02]項(xiàng)目里的超級(jí)對(duì)撞機(jī) 位于密歇根州 Traverse城東南12.5英里的 [11:03.62]12.5 miles southeast of Traverse City,Michigan. [11:05.39]一個(gè)空設(shè)的農(nóng)學(xué)院地下 [11:11.85]Which you did not hear about from me. [11:13.62]我沒(méi)告訴過(guò)你啊 [11:15.49]Look,just forget I told you about me... [11:18.57]not graduating from community college,okay? 你就別老記著我說(shuō)過(guò)... [11:20.86]Forget? You want me to forget? 社區(qū)大學(xué)沒(méi)畢業(yè) 好嗎? [11:22.46]This mind does not forget. 別老記著? 這能忘得掉嗎? [11:24.94]I haven't forgotten a single thing since the day my mother stopped breastfeeding me. 我這腦子 啥東西忘得掉啊! [11:26.71]從我媽給我斷奶后 我就沒(méi)忘掉過(guò)一件事 [11:30.08]- It was a drizzly Tuesday. - Okay... [11:33.10]Look,you promised me you would keep my secret, - 那天是周二 下著毛毛雨 - 好了... [11:35.22]so you're just gonna have to figure out a way to do it. 你答應(yīng)過(guò)我要保守秘密 [11:36.99]那你就想個(gè)辦法別漏嘴 [11:39.12]Leonard,I'm moving out. [11:40.89]Leonard 我要搬出去 [11:42.55]What do you mean you're moving out? Why? [11:44.81]There doesn't have to be a reason. 什么叫"要搬出去"? 為什么? [11:48.74]Yeah,there kinda does. 不一定非要有理由嘛 [11:50.59]Not necessarily. 是啊 總該有吧 [11:51.83]This is a classic example of Munchausen's Trilemma. [11:54.71]Either the reason is predicated on a series of sub-reasons leading to an infinite regression, 不一定非得有 [11:54.80]這是Munchausen三難推理的典型例子 [11:58.93]or it tracks back to arbitrary axiomatic statements, 要么就是 這個(gè)前提通過(guò)一系列 不斷弱化的次前提 已經(jīng)得到闡述 [12:01.30]or it's ultimately circular, 要么就是 能從所謂偶然的公理陳述中 找到答案 [12:02.74]i.e.I'm moving out because I'm moving out. [12:04.27]也有可能是終極循環(huán) [12:05.71]也就是說(shuō) 因?yàn)槲乙岢鋈?所以我要搬出去 [12:07.99]I'm still confused. [12:09.31]Leonard,I don't see how I could have made it any simpler. [12:10.96]我還是不懂 [12:13.45]Hey,qu'est que s'up? Leonard 我已經(jīng)說(shuō)得夠明白的了 [12:16.76]We just got back from that exhibit of those plasticized human cadavers. 嘿 伙計(jì)們 還好嗎? (蹩腳法語(yǔ)) [12:19.87]And some of those skinless chicks were Hot! 我們剛?cè)タ戳怂芑梭w標(biāo)本展 [12:22.84]那些個(gè)沒(méi)皮的小妞兒 真是辣喲! [12:24.48]If you'll excuse me,I'm going to pack. [12:28.27]That's kind of an overreaction to a little harmless necrophilia. 抱歉 我得去收拾了 [12:31.24]他對(duì)我單純的戀尸癖 反應(yīng)還真大 [12:33.99]It's not you,Howard. He says he's moving out. [12:37.39]What did you do? Howard 不關(guān)你事 他說(shuō)他要搬出去 [12:39.28]Did you change the contrast or brightness settings on the television? 你對(duì)他干了啥? [12:42.92]No. 你改了電視機(jī)的對(duì)比度和亮度? [12:43.52]Did you take a Band-Aid off in front of him? [12:46.60]No. 沒(méi)啊 [12:47.22]Did you buy generic ketchup, forget to rinse the sink, 你在他面前扒了創(chuàng)可貼? [12:49.74]talk to him through the bathroom door? 沒(méi) [12:50.19]你買了三無(wú)番茄醬? 忘了洗水池? [12:53.25]Adjust the thermostat,cook with cilantro,pronounce the "t" in often? 還是隔著廁所門(mén)同他講話? [12:56.22]調(diào)了恒溫器? 煮菜放了芫荽葉? "t"那音總是忘了發(fā)? [12:58.76]No. [13:00.90]Did you make fun of trains? 沒(méi)有 [13:05.33]No,I didn't do anything. He's just gone insane. 你是不是拿火車開(kāi)玩笑了? [13:08.41]Well,we all knew this day was coming. 沒(méi)有 我啥都沒(méi)干 他瘋了 [13:12.87]Well,that was fast. 也是 這天遲早會(huì)來(lái)的 [13:14.77]It's my pre-packed disaster evacuation bag. 你動(dòng)作還真快 [13:18.70]It's recommended by the Department of Homeland Security. 這是我早準(zhǔn)備好的避難行囊 [13:22.02]And Sarah Connor. 國(guó)土安全部推薦的 [13:25.11]Where are you going to live? 還有Sarah Connor ("終結(jié)者"女主人公) [13:26.85]Until I find a permanent place,I will stay with friends. 你打算住哪兒? [13:30.04]Bye. 在我找到寓所之前 我先在朋友家擠擠 [13:34.40]Well... you can't stay with me. 回見(jiàn) [13:36.23]I have a teeny-tiny apartment. 呃... 你不能住我那兒 [13:38.13]Excuse me,but isn't hosting guests an aspect of "manushya yajna," 我的公寓小得可憐 [13:42.50]one of the five central religious duties or sacrifices of the Hindu householder? 廣納賓客不正是"向人致敬"的一部分嗎? [13:45.47]"向人致敬"不是印度五大宗教戒規(guī)之一嗎? [13:50.57]I hate trains. [13:53.54]我討厭火車 [13:58.28]Don't be ridiculous,you love trains. [14:02.17]Yes,I do. Come on. 別開(kāi)玩笑了 你可喜歡火車了 [14:06.53]See you later,Leonard. 啊 沒(méi)錯(cuò) 來(lái)吧 [14:09.50]回見(jiàn) Leonard [14:14.65]This could work. [14:17.62]還真管用 [14:26.23]This is a very old building. [14:28.36]60 years. It used to be a watch factory. 這棟樓有年頭了 [14:32.20]What? 造了六十年了 以前是手表廠 [14:33.25]Don't you worry about the residual radium from the luminous dials? [14:35.17]怎么了? [14:37.61]Not until now! 你不擔(dān)心殘留在發(fā)光表盤(pán)里的鐳嗎? [14:40.63]I can't believe I didn't bring my Geiger counter. 你干嘛要提! [14:44.22]I had it on my bed and I didn't pack it. 我竟然沒(méi)帶蓋格計(jì)數(shù)器 (用于測(cè)量放射性物質(zhì)) [14:47.40]Well,if you're not comfortable staying here,Sheldon... 就在床頭 我居然沒(méi)拿 [14:48.99]I'm kidding,I packed it. 那么... Sheldon 要是你覺(jué)得住著不舒服 [14:52.04]It was a joke. 我開(kāi)玩笑的 我?guī)?lái)了 [14:53.16]I was subverting the conversational expectations. [14:56.11]I believe they call that the,uh,ol' switcharoo. 是個(gè)笑話 [14:56.13]我就是要破壞你的語(yǔ)境期待 [14:59.08]那叫啥來(lái)著 "出其不意" (語(yǔ)言的突然變化 以求意想不到的效果) [15:01.07]Terrific. [15:04.04]好極了 [15:06.40]Is that woman Aishwarya Rai? [15:08.38]Yes,isn't she an amazing actress? 那女的是Aishwarya Rai嗎? (印度當(dāng)紅影星) [15:10.16]Actually,I'd say she's a poor man's Madhuri Dixit. 是的 她是個(gè)很棒的演員吧 [15:13.77]How dare you! 我倒覺(jué)得她是可憐蟲(chóng)心中的Madhuri Dixit (印度90年代知名影星 后結(jié)婚生子) [15:16.02]Aishwarya Rai is a goddess. 你敢再說(shuō)一遍! [15:18.19]By comparison,Madhuri Dixit is a leprous prostitute. Aishwarya Rai是我的女神 [15:21.16]相比之下 Madhuri Dixit 就是得麻風(fēng)病的妓女 [15:24.13]Sorry,I didn't mean to offend you. [15:28.19]Obviously,you're not that familiar with Indian cinema. 對(duì)不起 我沒(méi)想到會(huì)冒犯你 [15:31.16]顯然你不了解印度電影 [15:39.92]Who is it? [15:41.18]Stripper-Gram! [15:42.89]誰(shuí)啊? [15:44.15]脫衣舞娘來(lái)嘍! [15:47.03]Tag,you're It. [15:50.36]Shouldn't you put him in a brown paper bag and set him on fire? 交給你了 [15:53.33]你就不能把他塞進(jìn)牛皮紙袋里 燒了算了? [15:57.00]I've never slept on an air mattress before. [16:00.71]No lumbar support whatsoever. 我從來(lái)沒(méi)睡過(guò)氣墊床 [16:04.08]Maybe you'd be happier on a park bench. 腰部都沒(méi)東西撐著 [16:07.05]你大概是想睡公園的長(zhǎng)椅上是吧 [16:08.57]I don't see any way to get a park bench in here. [16:12.22]Do you want to switch? 我認(rèn)為 你沒(méi)有辦法把長(zhǎng)椅弄到這兒來(lái) [16:13.46]No,that's fine. [16:14.82]I'm perfectly comfortable sleeping on a bouncy castle. 要換一下嗎? [16:16.43]不用了 這樣挺好 [16:17.79]睡在充氣城堡上可舒服呢 [16:20.64]Get out of bed. We're switching. [16:21.90]- Now,only if you want to. - Just get in the bed! [16:23.61]下床來(lái) 我和你換 [16:25.49]What's going on? - 我沒(méi)逼著你換 - 快下床! [16:27.35]Are you boys roughhousing? 這是怎么了? [16:31.43]We're just talking,Ma! 你們兩個(gè)臭小子 鬧什么鬧? [16:33.61]If you don't settle down right now, 老媽 我們只是在聊天! [16:36.16]I'm not going to let you have any more sleepovers! 要是你們?cè)俨唤o我安生點(diǎn) [16:39.13]看我以后還讓不讓你去朋友家過(guò)夜! [16:41.16]For God's sake,Ma,I'm 27 years old! [16:45.00]And it's not even a school night! 老天啊 老媽 我都27了! [16:47.97]明天又不上學(xué)! [16:51.88]Comfy now? [16:54.85]舒服了吧? [16:59.30]That poster of Halle Berry is a little unnerving. [17:03.63]So don't look at it. 那張Halle Barry的海報(bào)讓我有點(diǎn)緊張 (好萊塢女星 曾出演貓女) [17:05.73]She's like my fourth favorite Catwoman. 別看就是了 [17:07.83]No kidding. 她是我第四愛(ài)的貓女郎 [17:08.67]Yeah,Julie Newmar,Michelle Pfieffer,Eartha Kitt,and then her. [17:10.80]不是吧 [17:12.39]What about Lee Merriweather? 對(duì) 前三個(gè)是Julie Newmar Michelle Pfieffer 和Eartha Kitt [17:14.11]Oh,I forgot about Lee Merriweather. Lee Merriweather呢? [17:16.96]Well,I'm glad that's settled. 噢 我把她忘了 [17:19.79]That makes Halle Berry my fifth favorite Catwoman. 好吧 終于搞定了 [17:22.93]It's Julie Newmar,Michelle Pfieffer, Eartha Kitt,Lee Merriweather-- 那Halle Barry只能排第五了 [17:25.97]Please,I'm begging you. Go to sleep. Julie Newmar Michelle Pfieffer Eartha Kitt Lee Merriweather... [17:28.27]I'm trying. I'm counting Catwomen. 求求你了 睡覺(jué)吧 [17:31.24]我在努力嘛 都在數(shù)貓女郎了 [17:35.87]She did make a fine mutant in the X-Men movies,though. [17:38.59]Oh,for God's sake. 她在X戰(zhàn)警里演的變種人倒是不賴 [17:39.56]She's not my favorite of the X-Men. [17:40.88]In order that would be: Wolverine,Cyclops-- 噢 我求求你了 [17:43.13]Oh,wait,I forgot Professor X. X戰(zhàn)警里我最喜歡的不是她 [17:44.69]Professor X,Wolverine,Cyclops, Iceman,then Storm,Angel,the Beast-- 要排序的話應(yīng)該是:金鋼狼 雷射眼 [17:46.10]噢 等等 我忘了X教授 [17:49.07]No,wait,Nightcrawler. X教授 金鋼狼 雷射眼 冰人 然后是暴風(fēng)女 天使 還有野獸 [17:51.11]Professor X,Nightcrawler,Wolverine, Cyclops,Iceman,then Storm,Angel... 不對(duì) 等等 還有藍(lán)魔人 [17:54.08]X教授 藍(lán)魔人 金鋼狼 雷射眼 冰人 暴風(fēng)女 天使... [17:56.72]I'm coming! [17:59.69]來(lái)了! [18:02.08]There he is. There my old buddy bud bud. [18:05.05]是他 我的老-伙-計(jì) [18:11.70]What's with him? [18:13.06]Koothrappali dumped him on me, and he couldn't get to sleep, [18:15.58]so I gave him a glass of warm milk with a handful of my mom's Valium in it... 他是怎么了? [18:16.03]Koothrappali把他扔給了我 他睡不著覺(jué) [18:18.55]所以我給他倒了杯溫牛奶 里面放了一把我媽的安眠藥 [18:21.77]but he still wouldn't shut up,so tag,you're It. [18:24.74]可他還是不肯住嘴 得了 還給你吧 [18:28.97]I'm ba-a-a-ack. [18:32.23]I still don't know why you left. 我回...來(lái)了 [18:33.99]I can't tell you. 我還是不知道你為啥要走 [18:35.28]Why not? [18:36.60]I promised Penny. 不能告訴你 [18:39.71]You promised Penny what? 為什么? [18:39.57]我答應(yīng)過(guò)Penny [18:41.29]I wouldn't tell you the secret. 你答應(yīng)她什么了? [18:44.26]我答應(yīng)她保密啊 [18:47.81]What secret? Tell me the secret. [18:50.78]什么秘密? 快告訴我 [18:54.01]Mom smokes in the car. [18:56.98]老媽在車?yán)锍闊? [18:58.81]Jesus is okay with it but we can't tell Dad. [19:01.78]耶穌覺(jué)得沒(méi)問(wèn)題 不過(guò)不能告訴老爸 [19:04.33]Not that secret. The other secret. [19:06.74]- I'm Batman-- Shh! - Damn it! Sheldon! 不是這個(gè) 另一個(gè)秘密 [19:09.71]- 我是蝙蝠俠 噓! - 我靠! Sheldon! [19:13.49]You said Penny told you a secret. What's the secret? [19:17.06]Okay,I'll tell you,but you can't tell Leonard. 你說(shuō) Penny跟你說(shuō)了個(gè)秘密 什么秘密? [19:20.03]好吧 我告訴你 不過(guò)你不能告訴Leonard [19:22.21]I promise. [19:24.30]Penny lied about graduating from community college 我保證 [19:27.07]'cause she's afraid she's not smart enough for Leonard. Penny說(shuō)她是社區(qū)大學(xué)畢業(yè) 其實(shí)沒(méi)這回事 [19:30.04]因?yàn)樗伦约翰粔蚵斆?配不上Leonard [19:34.62]So it's nothing I did? It's her problem? [19:37.89]I drank milk that tasted funny. 不是我做錯(cuò)什么了? 是她的問(wèn)題? [19:40.86]我喝了杯牛奶 味道真好玩兒 [19:44.65]Penny thinks I'm too smart for her. That's ridiculous. [19:48.08]I know. Penny覺(jué)得我太聰明 這也太搞笑了 [19:50.70]Most of your work is extremely derivative. 我明白 [19:54.36]And don't worry,that's not a secret. 你的大部分工作 都不是原創(chuàng)的 [19:57.29]Everybody knows. 別擔(dān)心 這就不是秘密了 [20:00.26]誰(shuí)都知道 [20:05.06]Listen,I know what's been bothering you about us,and I have the answer. [20:08.75]What are you talking about? 聽(tīng)著 我已經(jīng)知道我們之間的問(wèn)題了 我也有了解決方案 [20:09.70]Okay,first,I want to say that it's not Sheldon's fault. [20:12.41]He tried very hard to keep your secret. 你在說(shuō)什么? [20:14.37]If Howard hadn't drugged him,he would've taken it to his grave. 好的 首先 這不是Sheldon的錯(cuò) [20:16.38]他已經(jīng)很努力地替你保密了 [20:18.32]He told you? 要不是Howard給他灌了安眠藥 他是不會(huì)自掘墳?zāi)沟? [20:19.37]Yes,but it's okay. [20:20.94]Now that we know what the problem is there's a simple solution. 他告訴你了? [20:23.34]是的 不過(guò)這沒(méi)關(guān)系 [20:24.99]Pasadena City College? 既然我們都知道問(wèn)題何在 要解決豈不是很容易 [20:27.39]A place for fun,a place for knowledge. [20:28.96]帕薩迪納城市學(xué)院? (托福分?jǐn)?shù)線最低的學(xué)校之一) [20:31.36]"給你知識(shí) 給你樂(lè)趣" [20:33.54]See,this man here is playing hackey-sack, and this girl's gonna be a paralegal. [20:37.51]看見(jiàn)沒(méi)? 這男的在玩沙包球 那女的會(huì)成為律師助手 [20:39.10]Oh,I get it. [20:40.40]Because Dr. Leonard Hofstadter can't date a girl without a fancy college degree. [20:43.07]噢 我明白了 [20:45.63]Well,it's really not that fancy. Leonard Hofstadter博士沒(méi)法和一個(gè) 沒(méi)有名牌大學(xué)文憑的女孩子談戀愛(ài) [20:47.26]It's just a city college. [20:49.92]Right,but I have to have some sort of degree to date you? 嗯... 其實(shí)這也不是個(gè)名校 [20:52.65]That doesn't matter to me at all. 只是城市學(xué)院而已 [20:54.39]So it's fine with you if I'm not smart. 沒(méi)錯(cuò) 不過(guò)要和你約會(huì) 總得有個(gè)學(xué)位什么的是吧? [20:57.07]Absolutely. 這對(duì)我而言一點(diǎn)都不重要 [20:58.36]所以如果我不聰明也沒(méi)關(guān)系 [21:01.04]絕對(duì)沒(méi)關(guān)系 [21:03.67]Okay,this time,I know where I went wrong. [21:07.64]好吧 這次我知道我錯(cuò)在哪兒了 [21:09.19]Bite me! [21:12.66]你能拿我怎么樣啊?!

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