高中英語作文的練習需要長期不斷的堅持,期間找準素材更能起到事半功倍的效果。以下是小編整理的高中英語作文|旅行前的準備的資料,希望對你的英語作文練習有所幫助!
Prepare my Grandparents' Journey to Shanghai
Firstly, we surfed the Internet together to book a hotel and got some information about train tickets. And we were overjoyed to learn that, luckily, the weather in Shanghai will be nice in the following days. The next morning, I went to the train station and waited for a long time before I bought two tickets. After I reached[1] home, I helped my grandparents to prepare their luggages[2],ensuring everything had been packed well. Yesterday afternoon, accompanied by me, my grandparents arrived at the train station safetly[3]. When the train began to move, I waved to them and gave them my best wishes.
Wish them to have a great journey!
修改意見:
[1] reach 表示到達是及物動詞,而這里的home前面沒有任何限定詞,則被視為副詞。所以這里改為:arrived home; 或者:got back home.
[2] luggage 是個不可數名詞,不要加復數。
[3] safetly拼寫錯誤;改為:safely
點評:22分,是一篇高檔次文章,文章整體流暢,用詞得體(聽了俺的話就是不一樣哈)。但稍微偏瘦了一點點,如果能在中間敘述部分稍微增添一丁點筆墨,就能使文章內容更充實,更雄渾有厚度。當然,這就是向滿分文章進軍了。
比如:when the train began to move 改成:When the train pulled out from the station, roaring away, I waved to them and gave them my best wishes.
最后一段的:Wish them to have a great journey! 改成:They reached out their heads, fixing their eyes on me, their faces beaming with satisfaction. 這僅僅是一種方向,一種熏陶,不要過多可以追求。