作者簡介
喬治.哈姆林.菲奇(George Hamlin Fitch,1852—1925),美國作家。在19世紀(jì)末到20世紀(jì)初的30多年時(shí)間里,菲奇在《舊金山紀(jì)事報(bào)》(San Francisco Chronicle)開設(shè)了每周專欄。他的作品還有《現(xiàn)代英語書的力量》(Modern English Books of Power)、《從典籍中找到安慰》(Comfort Found in Good Old Books)等。
本文最初發(fā)表于《舊金山紀(jì)事報(bào)》,后收入1911年出版的《從典籍中找到安慰》一書。文中,菲奇談及兒子死后,自己從閱讀中得到的慰藉:“把書放在觸手可及的架上,反復(fù)閱讀,直到書的智慧與美好滲入你心中......只有這樣,你才能武裝自己,面對(duì)現(xiàn)實(shí)命運(yùn)最殘酷的打擊?!弊掷镄虚g的父子情與愛書情會(huì)在不經(jīng)意間觸及每個(gè)人心底最柔軟的角落。
Nothing Soothes Grief Like Sterling Old Books—
How the Sudden Death of an Only Son Proved the
Value of the Reading Habit
沒有什么能像典籍一樣撫慰悲傷——
獨(dú)子的突然去世
印證了閱讀的價(jià)值
For the thirty years that I have spoken weekly to readers of the Chronicle through its book review columns, it has been my constant aim to preach the doctrine of the importance of cultivating the habit of reading good books, as the chief resource in time of trouble and sickness. This doctrine I enforced, because for many years reading has been my principal recreation, and I have proved its usefulness in broadening one’s view of life and in storing up material from the world’s greatest writers which can be recalled at will. But it never occurred to me that this habit would finally come to mean the only thing that makes life worth living.
When one passes the age of forty he begins to build a certain scheme for the years to come. That scheme may involve many things—domestic life, money-getting, public office, charity, education. With me it included mainly literary work, in which I was deeply interested, and close companionship with an only son, a boy of such lovable personal qualities that he had endeared himself to me from his early childhood. My relations with my son, Harold, were not those of the stern parent and the timid son, as Edmond Gosse has depicted with so much unconscious pathos in his Father and Son. Rather it was the relation of elder brother and younger brother.
30年來,我每周都通過《舊金山紀(jì)事報(bào)》的書評(píng)專欄向讀者訴說。我一直宣揚(yáng)培養(yǎng)閱讀好書這種習(xí)慣的重要性,讓人們將好書視為遭受困苦和病痛時(shí)的精神寄托。我如此強(qiáng)調(diào)這一點(diǎn),是因?yàn)槎嗄暌詠黹喿x已成為我的主要消遣;而且,我也證實(shí)了閱讀的好處,它能讓人拓寬眼界,并將世間最偉大作家們的思想儲(chǔ)存起來,以便隨時(shí)調(diào)用。但我從未料到,有一天閱讀會(huì)成為支撐我活下去的唯一動(dòng)力。
一個(gè)人年過不惑后,便會(huì)開始為余生作規(guī)劃。這個(gè)規(guī)劃可能包含很多事,比如家庭生活、賺錢、公職、慈善、教育。我的規(guī)劃里有自己心愛的文學(xué)作品,以及與獨(dú)生子的親密關(guān)系。這個(gè)小家伙的性格實(shí)在可愛,他從小時(shí)就是我的心頭肉。如果說埃德蒙?戈斯在《父與子》[1]中描述了一種嚴(yán)父怯子的關(guān)系,在不經(jīng)意間流露出傷感之情,我和兒子哈羅德則更像是一對(duì)親兄弟。
Hence, when only ten days ago this close and tender association of many years was broken by death—swift and wholly unexpected, as a bolt from cloudless skies—it seemed to me for a few hours as if the keystone of the arch of my life had fallen and everything lay heaped in ugly ruin. I had waited for him on that Friday afternoon until six o’clock. Friday is my day off, my one holiday in a week of hard work, when my son always dined with me and then accompanied me to the theater or other entertainment. When he did not appear at six o’clock in the evening I left a note saying I had gone to our usual restaurant. That dinner I ate alone. When I returned in an hour it was to be met with the news that Harold lay cold in death at the very time I wrote the note that his eyes would never see.
When the first shock had passed came the review of what was left of life to me. Most of the things which I had valued highly for the sake of my son now had little or no worth for me; but to take up again the old round of work, without the vivid, joyous presence of a companion dearer than life itself, one must have some great compensations; and the chief of these compensations lay in the few feet of books in my library case—in those old favorites of all ages that can still beguile me, though my head is bowed in the dust with grief and my heart is as sore as an open wound touched by a careless hand.
...
就在短短十天前,死神突如其來的造訪如同晴天霹靂一般,打破了這段維系多年的親密父子關(guān)系。有幾個(gè)小時(shí),我只覺得人生的支柱崩塌,一切都化為丑陋的廢墟。那個(gè)周五下午,我等他等到六點(diǎn)。周五是我繁忙的一周里唯一的假日,兒子總是在這天來找我吃飯,然后和我一起上劇院或找點(diǎn)別的樂子。那天晚上他到六點(diǎn)還沒露面,所以我留了張字條,說我先去我倆常去的飯館了。那頓飯是我一個(gè)人吃的。一小時(shí)后我回到家,才知道就在我留言的時(shí)候,哈羅德已永遠(yuǎn)閉上了雙眼,再也沒法看見我的留言了。
最初的震驚過后,我開始思考自己的一生還剩下些什么。我曾經(jīng)因?yàn)閮鹤佣诤醯臇|西,現(xiàn)在已經(jīng)沒有多少意義。對(duì)我來說,兒子比我的生命更重要。沒有活潑快樂的兒子相伴,我要想重新投入工作,就必須有極大的慰藉。這種慰藉,主要來自我書房里幾英尺高的書堆。盡管我被悲傷壓得抬不起頭,盡管我心里像被人胡亂觸碰的傷口一樣疼痛,但歷代受人喜愛的典籍仍能轉(zhuǎn)移我的注意力。
……
And so, in this roundabout way, I come back to my literary shelves, to urge upon you who are wrapped warm in domestic life and love to provide against the time when you may be cut off in a day from the companionship that makes life precious. Take heed and guard against the hour that may find you forlorn and unprotected against death’s malignant hand. Cultivate the great worthies of literature, even if this means the neglect of the latest magazine or of the newest sensational romance. Be content to confess ignorance of the ephemeral books that will be forgotten in a single half year, so that you may spend your leisure hours in genial converse with the great writers of all time. Dr. Eliot of Harvard recently aroused much discussion of his “five feet of books.” Personally, I would willingly dispense with two-thirds of the books he regards as indispensable. But the vital thing is that you have your own favorites—books that are real and genuine, each one brimful of the inspiration of a great soul. Keep these books on a shelf convenient for use, and read them again and again until you have saturated your mind with their wisdom and their beauty. So may you come into the true Kingdom of Culture, whose gates never swing open to the pedant or the bigot. So may you be armed against the worst blows that fate can deal you in this world.
于是,輾轉(zhuǎn)良久之后,我又回到書架前,提醒那些被親情和友愛包圍的人,為有朝一日失去生命中的至親作好準(zhǔn)備。有時(shí),死神的毒手會(huì)令你陷入孤獨(dú)無助的境地,你須要注意提防這種時(shí)刻的到來。與文學(xué)作品中的偉大人物為伴吧,即使這意味著要忽略最新的雜志或聳人聽聞的傳奇故事。忽略那些不出半年就會(huì)被人遺忘的應(yīng)時(shí)之作吧,這樣你才能利用閑暇時(shí)間與歷代文豪親切交談。最近,哈佛大學(xué)艾略特博士的“五英尺書架”[2]引起了熱議。在我看來,他所謂的必讀書有三分之二不必讀。但關(guān)鍵在于,你得有自己的喜好——每本貨真價(jià)實(shí)的書都蘊(yùn)含偉人的思想,能給讀者帶來啟迪。把這些書放在觸手可及的架上,反復(fù)閱讀,直到書的智慧與美好滲入你心中。只有這樣,你才能進(jìn)入真正的文化領(lǐng)域——它的大門永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)向賣弄學(xué)問或抱有偏見的人敞開。也只有這樣,你才能武裝自己,面對(duì)現(xiàn)實(shí)命運(yùn)最殘酷的打擊。
Who turns in time of affliction to the magazines or to those books of clever short stories which so amuse us when the mind is at peace and all goes well? No literary skill can bind up the brokenhearted; no beauty of phrase satisfy the soul that is torn by grief. No, when our house is in mourning, we turn to the Bible first—that font of wisdom and comfort which never fails him who comes to it with clean hands and a contrite heart. It is the medicine of life. And after it come the great books written by those who have walked through the Valley of the Shadow, yet have come out sweet and wholesome, with words of wisdom and counsel for the afflicted. One book through which beats the great heart of a man who suffered yet grew strong under the lash of fate is worth more than a thousand books that teach no real lesson of life, that are as broken cisterns holding no water, when the soul is athirst and cries out for refreshment.
This personal heart-to-heart talk with you, my patient readers of many years, is the first in which I have indulged since the great fire swept away all my precious books—the hoarded treasures of forty years. Against my will it has been forced from me, for I am like a sorely wounded animal and would fain nurse my pain alone. It is written in the first bitterness of a crushing sorrow; but it is also written in the spirit of hope and confidence—the spirit which I hope will strengthen me to spend time and effort in helping to make life easier for some poor boys in memory of the one dearest boy who has gone before me into that “undiscovered country,” where I hope someday to meet him, with the old bright smile on his face and the old firm grip of the hand that always meant love and tenderness and steadfast loyalty.
在痛苦的時(shí)候,有誰會(huì)求助于雜志,或者求助于你平心靜氣、萬事順意時(shí)讀著玩的小故事?沒有哪種文學(xué)技巧能彌補(bǔ)破碎的心靈,沒有哪種優(yōu)美的表達(dá)能撫慰悲傷的靈魂。沒錯(cuò),它們都沒用。當(dāng)全家沉浸于哀悼之中,我們首先會(huì)求助于《圣經(jīng)》。只要有一雙潔凈的手和一顆懺悔的心,這智慧與慰藉的源泉就絕不會(huì)讓你失望。它是生命的良藥。接下來,我們向偉大的作品求助。這些書的作者曾走過“死亡籠罩的幽谷”[3],他們寫下的書卻如此動(dòng)人、如此有益身心。書中充滿睿智的話語和忠告,為苦難者帶來幫助。有些人在命運(yùn)的錘打下變得堅(jiān)強(qiáng),這種人嘔心瀝血寫的一本書勝過一千本沒有揭示人生真諦的書。對(duì)焦渴難耐、高呼求水的靈魂來說,沒有揭示人生真諦的書就像破裂的蓄水池,無法提供水源。
長期支持我的耐心的讀者們,這次和你們談?wù)撍绞?,是自從大火吞噬了?0年來收集的珍貴藏書之后,我第一次這樣放縱自己的情感。我就像受傷的孤獸,喜歡自己療傷;這次放縱情感,實(shí)非我的本意。這篇文章是我在第一波悲痛來襲時(shí)寫成的,也是帶著希望和信心寫成的——但愿這種希望和信心能讓我堅(jiān)強(qiáng)起來,讓我投入時(shí)間和精力,去幫助那些可憐的孩子擺脫艱苦的生活,以此紀(jì)念比我早進(jìn)入“未知國度”的愛子。但愿有朝一日,當(dāng)我與愛子在天國重逢時(shí),他會(huì)像過去一樣,露出燦爛的笑容并緊緊地拉住我的手,那曾一直是我倆友愛、溫情和堅(jiān)定忠誠的象征。
[1] 埃德蒙.威廉.戈斯(Sir Edmund William Gosse,1849—1928),英國詩人、評(píng)論家,《父與子》(Father and Son)是他1907年出版的自傳。
[2] “五英尺書架”,指前哈佛大學(xué)校長查爾斯.艾略特(Charles Eliot)1909年出版的《哈佛經(jīng)典》。全書共51冊(cè),收集的經(jīng)典包容頗豐,從古希臘的悲劇和哲學(xué)到19世紀(jì)的達(dá)爾文進(jìn)化論皆有。全書剛好放滿一個(gè)五英尺長的書架,“五英尺書架”因此得名。
[3] 此處源自《圣經(jīng).詩篇》23:4,原句為“我雖走過死亡籠罩的幽谷,卻無懼邪惡”(Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil)。
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