哈利波特與魔法石The Letters from No One(六)
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The repaired alarm clock rang at six o'clock the next morning. Harry turned it off quickly and dressed silently. He mustn't wake the Dursleys. He stole downstairs without turning on any of the lights.
He was going to wait for the postman on the corner of Privet Drive and get the letters for number four first. His heart hammered as he crept across the dark hall toward the front door —
“AAAAARRRGH!”
Harry leapt into the air; he'd trodden on something big and squashy on the doormat — something alive!
Lights clicked on upstairs and to his horror Harry realized that the big, squashy something had been his uncle's face. Uncle Vernon had been lying at the foot of the front door in a sleeping bag, clearly making sure that Harry didn't do exactly what he'd been trying to do. He shouted at Harry for about half an hour and then told him to go and make a cup of tea. Harry shuffled miserably off into the kitchen and by the time he got back, the mail had arrived, right into Uncle Vernon's lap. Harry could see three letters addressed in green ink.
“I want — ” he began, but Uncle Vernon was tearing the letters into pieces before his eyes.
Uncle Vernon didn't go to work that day. He stayed at home and nailed up the mail slot.
“See,” he explained to Aunt Petunia through a mouthful of nails, “if they can't deliver them they'll just give up.”
“I'm not sure that'll work, Vernon.”
“Oh, these people's minds work in strange ways, Petunia, they're not like you and me,” said Uncle Vernon, trying to knock in a nail with the piece of fruitcake Aunt Petunia had just brought him.
On Friday, no less than twelve letters arrived for Harry. As they couldn't go through the mail slot they had been pushed under the door, slotted through the sides, and a few even forced through the small window in the downstairs bathroom.
Uncle Vernon stayed at home again. After burning all the letters, he got out a hammer and nails and boarded up the cracks around the front and back doors so no one could go out. He hummed “Tiptoe Through the Tulips” as he worked, and jumped at small noises.
On Saturday, things began to get out of hand. Twenty-four letters to Harry found their way into the house, rolled up and hidden inside each of the two dozen eggs that their very confused milkman had handed Aunt Petunia through the living room window. While Uncle Vernon made furious telephone calls to the post office and the dairy trying to find someone to complain to, Aunt Petunia shredded the letters in her food processor.
“Who on earth wants to talk to you this badly?” Dudley asked Harry in amazement.
第二天早上六點(diǎn)，修好的鬧鐘鈴鈴地響起來。哈利迅速地把它關(guān)掉，靜靜地穿上衣服。千萬別把社斯利一家給吵醒了。他一盞燈都沒開便偷偷地下了樓。
他打算在這里等郵遞員的到來，這樣他就可以拿到給他的信了。當(dāng)他躡手躡腳地從大廳向前門走過去的時(shí)候，他的心撲通撲通地跳起來。
"噢！"
哈利被嚇得跳得老高——他踩到了門墊上一件又大又軟的東西——還是活的。
樓上的燈亮了。哈利驚奇地發(fā)現(xiàn)剛才那個(gè)又大又軟的東西居然是維能姨文的臉。
維能姨丈為了防止哈利早早地過來拿信，居然在門口用睡袋睡了一夜！他向哈利大叫大喊了幾乎半個(gè)小時(shí)，然后叫他去沖一杯茶。哈利垂頭喪氣地進(jìn)了廚房。當(dāng)他回來的時(shí)候，郵件已經(jīng)到了，正放在維能姨丈的膝蓋上。哈利可以看見三封信都是用同樣的綠色墨水寫的。
"我想——"沒等他說完，維能姨丈已經(jīng)當(dāng)著他的面把信撕了個(gè)粉碎。
維能姨丈那天沒有去上班。他在家準(zhǔn)備把那個(gè)郵箱釘牢了。
"看著吧，"他含著一口釘子對(duì)帕尤妮亞姨媽說，"如果他們寄不到他們就會(huì)放棄的。""我不認(rèn)為那行得通，維能。"
"喔，這些人想法奇怪得很，帕尤妮亞，他們不像我和你那么想事情。"維能姨丈一邊說一邊準(zhǔn)備把帕尤妮亞姨媽剛剛遞給他的水果蛋糕當(dāng)錘子去敲釘子。
星期五那天，至少有十二封信是寄給哈利的。因?yàn)樗鼈儧]法塞在郵箱里，它們被從門底下和邊縫處塞了進(jìn)來，還有幾封是從樓下廁所的小窗戶處被塞進(jìn)來的。
維能姨丈又沒有去上班。在把所有的信都燒掉后，他拿出鐵錘和釘子把前門和后門所有的裂縫給釘死了，這樣沒人可以出得去了。他一邊釘一邊哼著"踮著腿從郁金香之間走過去"的小曲，而且一聽到一點(diǎn)動(dòng)靜就尖跳起來。
到了星期六，事情的發(fā)展完全失去了控制。二十四封給哈利的信出現(xiàn)在房子里。
它們是被卷起來分別藏在二十四只雞蛋中由送牛奶的人從臥室窗口遞給帕尤妮亞姨媽的。在維能姨丈怒氣沖沖地向郵局和牛奶場(chǎng)打電話找人投訴的時(shí)候，帕尤妮亞姨媽已經(jīng)用她的食品攪拌器把信攪得粉碎了。
"到底是誰這么希望跟你說話呢？"達(dá)德里這樣好奇地問哈利。
