GRE作文 ETS官方Issue主題范文(六)

Over time, the basic needs of mankind have been met due to interests in the commonplace mixed with a progressive trait in man to make things simpler, faster, less expensive, and more gratifying.

Today, our "simple thoughts" turn to ideas such as space stations, the technological superhighway, and electric vehicles. Sadly, we must also repair much of the fallout from some of our "commonplace" inspired ideas.  For example, evolved transportation has a price as we work to restore our environment.

If we are  inspired by the simple motivations, dreams, and tasks of everyday life then we must make a commitment to development our muse.  Perhaps, the best way to move ahead is to step back; to re-examine and learn from  the art, science, history, love and war of our founding fathers.  Perhaps simple is best.  After all, that's where all the best ideas are born.

COMMENTARY

This essay presents a competent discussion of the issue.  The opening paragraph introduces two ideas that serve as the primary focus of the essay.  The first is that, as the topic claims, the best ideas are the result of an interest in commonplace things; the second is that our ideas are evolving at a rate of rapidity that would "surely baffle our forefathers."  These two ideas are adequately developed in the course of the paper, but not with enough fluency or complexity to merit a score of 5.

The second paragraph, which considers the way in which ideas arise from an interest in commonplace things, is the most thoroughly developed section of the response.  The examples are relevant: Thomas Jefferson, who used everyday observations to come up with the idea of homeowners insurance, and Theodore Roosevelt, whose passionate interest in nature led him to develop the National Parks Protection program.

The essay's other area of focus -- the rapid rate at which our ideas change -- is discussed in the third paragraph.  Some good ideas emerge, but, unfortunately, they are not well developed.

The essay is organized with an introduction, three supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion.  However, the organization would be stronger if the ideas in one paragraph or section were more clearly connected to the points made in the next section.

While there are some errors, they are not severe enough to interfere with meaning.  In general, the writer expresses ideas adequately, although at times the wording seems almost haphazard and therefore a bit confusing: "to re-examine and learn from the art, science, history, love and war of our founding fathers."  For reasons of adequate content and adequate presentation of ideas, this essay received a score of 4.

SAMPLE-4 (score 3)

The best ideas arise from a passionate interest in commonplace things.  This is something I learned from everyday experiences.  I always found that the things I decorated my life with abundantly, were the things I treasured most.  It could be a memory, a possesion, or just a view.  It's hard to create a whole picture without first looking at the pieces within it.  My whole life of school and studies have brought me to college and have sparked my interest in applying to a graduate program.  Never before did I realize how these little efforts would create this dream.  In my field of dietetics many would be amazed to find that the food we eat could kill us or help us from disease.

There are many times where I'll be looking at the beautiful view, and I just have to go out and enjoy it.  I do this by walking, gardening, or just lying in the grass.  The feeling of the warm sun makes me dream.  I know I'm not the only one who tends to overlook the basic things, like the tree outside that you used to climb, or the food you eat to give you energy and growth.  We just have to take the time from our busy schedules to stop and smell the roses.