新編大學英語第一冊unit8 Text B: It's a Mugger's Game in Manha
UNIT 8 AFTER-CLASS READING 1; New College English (I)
It's a Mugger's Game in Manhattan
1 Martin had lived in New York for forty years and never been mugged once. This did not make him confident on the contrary, it terrified him. The way he saw it, he was now the most likely person in Manhattan to get mugged next.
2 "What are the odds of my getting mugged?" he asked his friend Lenny.
3 "How much are you willing to bet?" said Lenny, who was a compulsive gambler.
4 "Oh come on, this is too important to bet on!"
5 "Nothing is too important to bet on," said Lenny, shocked. That was the end of their friendship.
6 "How do you think I can avoid getting mugged?" Martin asked his friend Grace. Grace had not been outside her apartment in five years, as a sure-fire way of avoiding being mugged. It had failed; someone had broken in and mugged her.
7 "I've no idea, Martin," she said. "Most of these guys are on drugs anyway, and they need the money for their addiction."
8 This gave Martin an idea. If the muggers only needed the money for drugs, why didn't he offer them drugs instead? Then possibly they would be so grateful they wouldn't harm him. Through some rich friends he knew he bought small quantities of heroin and cocaine. He had never touched the stuff himself, so he had to label them carefully to make sure he didn't get them mixed up.
9 One day he was walking in a part of Central Park he shouldn't have been in (the part where there is grass and trees) when three men leapt out at him. One was black, one was Puerto Rican and one was Caucasian. Well, at least mugging is being integrated he thought.
10 "You want drugs?" he cried. "I've got drugs! Anything you want you can have. Just name it. But don't touch me!"
11 The three men let go of him respectfully.
12 "We almost made a big mistake there," said one of them. "This guy's a pusher. Hurt him, and we could have the Mafia down on us. Let's see what you got, mister."
13 Somewhat to his surprise Martin found himself displaying his wares to his clientele. Even more to his surprise, he found himself accepting money for the drugs, much more than he'd paid for them.
14 "How come you guys have all this money?" He said. "Why are you out mugging if you have money?"
15 "Well, we're not real muggers," said the Caucasian embarrassed. "We're out-of-work actors."
16 "I thought out-of-work showbiz people always became waiters or barmen," said Martin.
17 "Right. But there are so many showbiz people in catering now that you can't get work as waiters. So we had to get work as muggers.
18 When Martin got home, he bought some more drugs from his friend. Pretty soon he sold them to some more muggers. Pretty soon after that he found he was spending more and more time pushing drugs, and making more and more money at it. Being afraid of muggings had turned him into a professional drug-pusher.
19 One day a man leapt out at him and grabbed him. "You want drugs?" said Martin. "I got drugs.
20 "I want money," said a familiar voice.
21 "Lenny!" cried Martin. "How're you doing?"
22 "Badly," said Lenny. "I lost everything gambling."
23 He hit Martin over the head and took his money, wallet and all his credit cards, leaving the little packets of white powder behind.
