這十種“有毒”的朋友還是敬而遠(yuǎn)之吧

“多個(gè)朋友多條路”。可是，如果你的朋友“有毒”呢?有研究顯示，如果一個(gè)人感到疲憊、崩潰或缺乏自信，那可能不是你本身的問(wèn)題，而可能是因?yàn)槟愕呐笥?ldquo;有毒”。那些用語(yǔ)言或行為給人帶來(lái)困擾，讓人感到灰心喪氣甚至感覺(jué)生活“了無(wú)生趣”的朋友被稱(chēng)為“有毒朋友”。如果身邊有以下這十種人，最好還是遠(yuǎn)離他們吧。

 

 

1. They always seem to be focusing on the negative side of things

1. 他們似乎總是關(guān)注事情消極的一面

Friends share the ups and downs of their lives with each other. However, friends who are toxic tend to always talk about how everything that is bad without seeing any of the good. They tend to ignore all the good which makes you ignore it as well bringing your mood and motivation down. It’s important to help them out with their problems but also make sure it doesn’t affect you negatively.

朋友們互相分享生活中的歡樂(lè)與波折。然而，“有毒”的朋友總是要談?wù)撛愀獾氖虑?，看不到生活中的閃光點(diǎn)。他們總是忽略生活中的好人好事，這讓你也忽略了它們，使你情緒不佳，失去動(dòng)力。幫他們解決問(wèn)題很重要，但也要確保這不會(huì)給你帶來(lái)消極影響。

2. They never listen to any of your problems

2. 他們從不傾聽(tīng)你的任何問(wèn)題

They always call you when something is wrong with them but never seem to have time for you when you have a problem. They expect you to be there for them when something goes wrong but are nowhere to be found when you need help. Friends who do this leave you feeling more lonely than you realise.

他們遇到問(wèn)題時(shí)總愛(ài)給你打電話(huà)，但當(dāng)你遇到問(wèn)題時(shí)總是沒(méi)時(shí)間。遇上麻煩時(shí)，他們希望你隨時(shí)支持，但當(dāng)你需要幫助時(shí)他們卻沒(méi)影了。這樣的朋友讓你感到更孤獨(dú)。

3. They are quick to point out your flaws

3. 他們對(duì)你的缺點(diǎn)脫口而出

Honesty is important in any relationship, and friendships are no exception. However, it’s when the honesty becomes relentless criticism of everything you do that the relationship becomes toxic. You find yourself unable to talk to your friend because you are afraid that they will point out everything you did wrong instead of offering you their support.

在任何關(guān)系中，誠(chéng)實(shí)都很重要，友誼也不例外。然而，當(dāng)這種誠(chéng)實(shí)變成無(wú)論你做什么都會(huì)遭到無(wú)休止的批評(píng)，這種友誼就“有毒”了。你發(fā)現(xiàn)無(wú)法和朋友交談，因?yàn)槟愫ε滤麄儠?huì)指出你做的所有錯(cuò)誤之處，而不是給予支持。

4. They get mad at you easily

4. 他們很容易就對(duì)你發(fā)火

It’s perfectly normal to experience friction and have arguments in your relationships. Toxic friends seem to always get angry with you for the smallest things you do. Any argument that you have always leaves you feeling guilty and apologetic. Friends like this are toxic because they aren’t able to work out problems in a mature way.

朋友之間鬧些小矛盾、發(fā)生些小爭(zhēng)吵再正常不過(guò)了。“有毒”的朋友總因?yàn)槟阕龅闹ヂ榇蟮男∈聦?duì)你發(fā)火。你們發(fā)生的爭(zhēng)吵總讓你感到內(nèi)疚和歉意。這樣的朋友“有毒”，因?yàn)樗麄儫o(wú)法成熟地解決問(wèn)題。

5. They aren’t happy for your success

5. 他們不因你的成功而快樂(lè)

Friends who don’t appreciate your success and celebrate with you are friends who are toxic to your life. People who love you will be happy when they see your happiness. It’s important for friends to be happy for each other and celebrate each other’s good fortune to maintain healthy, supportive relationships.

不欣賞你的成功、不與你同慶的朋友是“有毒”的。真正愛(ài)你的朋友在見(jiàn)到你快樂(lè)時(shí)也會(huì)快樂(lè)。為對(duì)方的快樂(lè)而開(kāi)心、為對(duì)方的好運(yùn)而歡慶對(duì)保持健康、互相支持的友誼來(lái)說(shuō)很重要。

6. They always want to talk about themselves

6. 他們總想談?wù)撟约?/p>

Friends like this always seem to be talking about their accomplishments. They never think to ask about you or your life, and it seems like they don’t really care. Friends like this are harmful to your life because they leave you feeling like you are unimportant.

這類(lèi)朋友總想談?wù)撟约旱某删?。他們從不想著?wèn)問(wèn)你和你的生活，對(duì)此似乎根本不在意。這種朋友“有毒”，因?yàn)樗麄冏屇愀杏X(jué)自己不重要。

7. They don’t care enough to keep in touch

7. 他們對(duì)保持聯(lián)絡(luò)不太在意

Life is complicated. It’s important to understand that sometimes people can’t always call or talk to you but they are thinking of you. However, relationships get toxic when the other person isn’t thinking of you and makes no attempt to keep in contact. You find yourself being the only one reaching out, while they seem uninterested in maintaining the relationship. This is toxic because to have a healthy life you should engage in mutually fulfilling relationships with people who care about you as much as you care about them.

生活很復(fù)雜。有時(shí)候人們不能總給你打電話(huà)或者和你交談，但他們心里想著你，要理解這一點(diǎn)。然而，當(dāng)朋友并沒(méi)想著你，也沒(méi)有嘗試保持聯(lián)絡(luò)。這段友情就“有毒”了。你發(fā)現(xiàn)只有自己總是去聯(lián)絡(luò)朋友，而朋友對(duì)保持友誼沒(méi)興趣。這種友誼“有毒”，因?yàn)闉榱私】瞪睿銘?yīng)該融入令雙方滿(mǎn)足的友誼，你關(guān)心朋友，朋友也要關(guān)心你。

8. They never consider your feelings

8. 他們從不考慮你的感受

Friends who never consider how their actions or words affect you are toxic to be around. They do things to benefit themselves even if it means your feelings are being compromised. It’s unhealthy to have people like this in your life because you should surround yourself with people who don’t better themselves at the expense of others.

有些“有毒”朋友從不會(huì)考慮到他們的行為或言語(yǔ)會(huì)影響到你。他們做有利于自己的事情，即使這意味著你的感情會(huì)因此受傷。有這樣的朋友對(duì)你來(lái)說(shuō)不健康，因?yàn)榕笥巡粦?yīng)該損人以利己。

9. They pressure you to do things you don’t want to do

9. 他們迫使你做不想做的事

When you’re around them, they pressure you into doing things you aren’t comfortable and make you feel like a loser when you don’t do them. It’s good to be around people who encourage you to try new things but it becomes toxic when they are forcing you to do things. You should be encouraged but not forced to try new things and move out of your comfort zone. Being forced to do anything has dire consequences that makes relationships like this toxic.

當(dāng)你和“有毒”朋友在一起，他們總是迫使你做一些讓你感到不快，或者不去做就感覺(jué)很失敗的事情。結(jié)交鼓勵(lì)你嘗試新鮮事物的朋友對(duì)你有好處，但當(dāng)他們迫使你做這些時(shí)就“有毒”了。朋友應(yīng)該鼓勵(lì)你嘗試新鮮事物，而不是迫使你這樣做，讓你感到不快。被迫使做事有不良后果，讓友誼變得“有毒”。

10. They aren’t willing to change

10. 他們不愿意改變

Human beings are constantly changing. Change is important in relationships. To maintain relationships and grow as people you should be able to change and adapt to each other to an extent that is beneficial to both of you. Friends who are set in their ways, which may not necessarily be right, and don’t attempt to change and grow are toxic to your life.

人們總在改變。改變對(duì)友誼很重要。為了維護(hù)友誼和個(gè)人成長(zhǎng)，你應(yīng)該有能力改變，并互相適應(yīng)，以達(dá)到對(duì)你和朋友都有利的程度。固步自封未必正確，那些不愿嘗試改變和成長(zhǎng)的是“有毒”朋友。