是什么讓你自卑?

是什么讓你自卑?

No sense of personal sovereignty.

沒(méi)有個(gè)人主權(quán)意識(shí)。

We are expected from birth to listen to and obey the wishes of others. A stimuli that most of us grow up with and the effects of which culminate over time. Ultimately, we lose any sense of personal sovereignty and inner guidance; and thus, we believe that someone else always has the - more correct way - or knows better than we do.

我們從一出生就被期待能聽(tīng)話并遵從他人意愿。我們大多數(shù)人成長(zhǎng)過(guò)程所伴隨的刺激及其產(chǎn)生的影響隨著時(shí)間的流逝達(dá)到頂峰，最終我們喪失了個(gè)人主權(quán)意識(shí)和內(nèi)心的指引，所以我們相信別人總會(huì)有更正確的方法，或者比我們更懂。

We discount our own intuition and mistrust ourselves as a result of this learned response. Subsequently, this becomes a filter for how we view the world, and for how we view ourselves in the world.

由于這種習(xí)得的反應(yīng)我們忽視自己的直覺(jué)，不相信自己。后來(lái)這就成為了我們看待世界和這個(gè)世界中的自己的濾鏡。

We come to rely on the opinions of others for validation, because we expect that everyone else knows better than we do. And the more we get validation from others, the more we seek it. It becomes an addiction. When we are validated by someone else, it triggers our psycho-biological reward system releasing dopamine into the brain. We feel good. We feel accepted. We want more of that feeling.

我們開(kāi)始用別人的看法去證實(shí)，因?yàn)槲覀冋J(rèn)為別人都比自己更懂。我們從別人那兒求證越多，就越愿意去求證，最后成為習(xí)慣。我們從別人那里獲得認(rèn)可后就會(huì)誘發(fā)我們的心理——生理獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)機(jī)制向大腦釋放多巴胺，使我們自我感覺(jué)良好，有認(rèn)同感，我們還想獲得更多的這種感覺(jué)。

The rub is because we do not validate ourselves, we rarely get the validation we want from others. Or worse, we restructure our lives and the way we live in order to garner as much attention as possible. Our identity becomes lost in the quest for external validation.

受挫是因?yàn)槲覀儾幌蜃约簩で笳J(rèn)可，而且很少能從他人那里獲得我們所需的認(rèn)可，更有甚者，我們會(huì)重建自己的生活和生活方式來(lái)盡可能獲得關(guān)注，我們?cè)趯で笸饨缯J(rèn)可中迷失了自我。

If we would just validate, trust and know ourselves this cycle could be broken.

如果我們能認(rèn)可自己，信賴并了解自己，就能打破這個(gè)怪圈。