就像一段異地戀情一樣,生活在不同城市的朋友間也很難保持友情的熱度。
Now scientists say they have uncovered the key to staying close and it appears to be different for men and women.
現(xiàn)在科學(xué)家說,他們已經(jīng)發(fā)現(xiàn)了保持親密的訣竅—但這對(duì)于男人和女人來說似乎是不同的。
Men need to meet up face-to-face and bond over activities, according to the study of students leaving home for the first time, while for female friendships, long phone conversations can bridge the physical distance.
根據(jù)一項(xiàng)對(duì)初次離家的學(xué)生展開的調(diào)查,男人需要面對(duì)面的接觸,并通過活動(dòng)保持聯(lián)系,而在女人的友誼中,煲電話粥也可以把距離拉近。
Professor Robin Dunbar, who led the work at the University of Oxford, said: "What determined whether [friendships] survived with girls was whether they made effort to talk more to each other on the phone."
牛津大學(xué)領(lǐng)導(dǎo)該研究的羅賓•鄧巴教授說:“女孩之間的友誼能否存續(xù)的決定因素在于她們是否努力在電話里聊得更多。”
However, talking had absolutely no effect on boys relationships, the study found.
然而,該研究發(fā)現(xiàn),談話對(duì)于男孩間的友誼沒有絲毫作用。
"What held up their friendships was doing stuff together", said Dunbar.
“支撐他們友誼的是一起活動(dòng)”,鄧巴說:
"Going to a football match, going to the pub for a drink, playing five-a-side."
“比如一起去看足球賽、去酒吧喝酒以及踢五人足球。”
"They had to make the effort. "
“他們必須做出努力。”
"It was a very striking sex difference. " Should men invest more in friendships?
“這體現(xiàn)了驚人的性別差異。”男人應(yīng)該在友誼里投入更多嗎?
In the research, thirty students who were in their final year of sixth form were asked to compile detailed lists of all their friends and how close they felt to each of them.
在這項(xiàng)研究中,30名高中畢業(yè)生被要求詳細(xì)列出所有的朋友以及與每個(gè)朋友間的親密度。
Four months after the initial assessment, the students took their final A-level exams and many left home for university.
在這次初期評(píng)估的四個(gè)月后,這些學(xué)生參加了A-level考試,當(dāng)中許多人離開家上大學(xué)。
They were then followed up nine months and 18 months after the initial assessment.
研究人員分別在9個(gè)月后和18個(gè)月后對(duì)他們進(jìn)行了跟蹤研究。
Speaking to journalists at the annual meeting of the American Association for the Advancement of Science in Boston, Dunbar said different friendship styles between genders could be behind the effect.
在波士頓舉行的美國科學(xué)促進(jìn)會(huì)的年會(huì)上,鄧巴對(duì)記者說道,男女對(duì)待友誼的不同方式是這種現(xiàn)象背后的原因。
"This is about the idea that women clearly have much more intense close friendships", he said.
“女人間的友誼顯然更加緊密”,他說。
"They're very intense, very like romantic relationships in the sense if they break, they break catastrophically.
“這種關(guān)系非常緊密,非常像愛情—在這種強(qiáng)度下,如果關(guān)系破裂了,就是災(zāi)難性的。”
By contrast, men tend to have more casual friendships.
相比之下,男人間的關(guān)系往往更加隨意。
"They tend to have a group of four guys that they do stuff with", he said.
“他們喜歡四個(gè)人湊在一起活動(dòng)”,他說。
"With guys it is out of sight out of mind. "
“但不見面就忘了。”
"They just find four more guys to go drinking with. "
“他們只會(huì)另外找四個(gè)人一起去喝酒。”